The bear shifter's dominant neko 『B』•『B』

I am sorry

      WARNING: This chapter contains triggering content!

       Also, I had to change some ages... sorry! I will edit them in the entire book, I promise!

       After Sirius couldn't sense Baloo's presence anymore he started walking with heavy steps towards the wall. He placed his hand on it and watched the colors swirl around his fingers, clenching his other fist and knocking onto the surface with his knuckles, making the sound travel through thick layers of incandescent material.  

         'How am I gonna take this down?' Sirius thought, hitting his fist over the wall only to hear a muffled clack and see staggering circles surround the area around his hand like a rock hitting the surface of the water. He tried using his elbows and feet, and even rocks but it was all futile as the wall remained undamaged. 

         Walking his hand through his hair Sirius looked at every ounce of the cavern, remembering the first time he came here and met his shifter... the same day he supposedly built this wall and locked his cat away. Clenching his fists by his sides and closing his eyes tightly he thought about all the feelings he felt towards his cat trying to let them vanish and turn all the anger, shame and disappointment into senseless abeyance. Then he started thinking about all the good times he spent with his animal when it was still a shapeless voice into his head. They weren't many but they were still there. 

           "Can you hear me? I wanna mend things back together with you...but I am still so afraid to do it..." Sirius finally said, his voice cracking a bit at the end.

       "I am sorry for punishing you all this time, but you were a constant reminder of how weak I have been. I blamed you for what happened in the past and I wanted you to suffer. But I never realized I went this far. I've been keeping you locked in here for 5 fucking years! You didn't deserve any of these..."

        The light in the room palpitated between bleached brightness and pitched murk, Sirius' knuckles turning white from holding his fists too tightly.  

      "I am so sorry! When I saw you for the first time I realized you were everything my parents hated. You were small and frail and I thought accepting you meant being powerless again. I thought you'd put me in danger again, along with the ones whom I loved."

        "But people keep on telling me strength doesn't come only with muscles and size. There are a lot of kinds of  strength and I haven't let you show me yours yet. And even if you don't have one, I can be the strong one for both of  us. I shouldn't have expected you to handle my problems in my place."

       "I want you to be there to cherish the beautiful things in our life together. I wanna be able to entrust my life to you again, Sasha!"

            A loud crack echoed into the room and Sirius opened his eyes just in time to see the wall dissipate into millions of colorful pieces which turned translucent and then disappeared midway into the air. The wall vanished and Sirius stepped into the pitched darkness onto the other side. 

       "Sasha?" He asked, spinning around and seeing only a veil of shadows enclosing around him. He started walking aimlessly, even the light of the cave perishing behind.  Then suddenly, three smokey figures appeared before him and he could see a man and a woman walking with a kid by their side, the later whimpering while the woman coerced him to approach a group of older homeless boys. 

      "Mummy, why do I have to do this?" The little boy asked, clinging on his mother's arm whilst the woman tried desperately  to pull him away. 

     "I heard your stomach growl, Sirius. This means you are hungry."

     "B-but why can't I eat home?"