✔️| The Gift of a Curse {1}

~ 27 ~

It has been my habit for the past few weeks to turn into Amoux and run to the waterfall every time I am shocked by something that happens.
Although I figure that it is a better option than losing control once again. Once I reached my destination, I did not turn back to my human form. I just sat on top of the waterfall as I felt the wind gently kiss my fur.
I had so many unanswered questions, I did not understand many things that were happening, and I felt like I was being played by the traitor that is in my pack.
I was not angry, neither was Amoux, we just wanted this nightmare to be over. However, my instinct told me that the real war has not started yet. That thought brought me nothing but a sense of coldness in my bones.
I was not afraid of what the future might bring, but rather of what I will do to stop it. I feared that I would commit another action that would cost my people more than what they have already paid for my actions. I would rather die than let them suffer more than they already did because of me.
"You look like you need to blow off some steam." Shadow sat next to my large wolf. She ran her soft hand through my fur causing Amoux to purr in pleasure.
My wolf moved closer to our mate and placed his head on her lap. She chuckled at our actions as her hand touched Amoux's face.
"Damn, your eyes are even more peculiar in your wolf form." Shadow stared into my wolf eyes. Amoux panted happily with his tongue out of his mouth as he stared back at her.
I am starting to think that the only reason you gave me a chance is because of my eyes.
"Well, it is not the only reason." She gave me a playful look.
"Listen, I know we are faced with countless uncertainties right now, but we cannot let it affect and change who we are; that would give our foe a chance to win." She tugged at my fur enough to earn a growl; she must have been angry or perhaps frustrated at the chaos that basically cornered us from every angle.
Seems like you too have some tension you need to get rid of.
"That is true." She mumbled as she took a quick look at the beautiful view below us.
I cannot wait to write about all of this in my journal tonight. I reckon I will rip the papers as I write. I thought to myself. However, I made the mistake to not pull up my mental wall. Therefore, Shadow heard me.
"You know, with everything that has happened, I forgot that you write a journal." Her voice was not judgmental or mocking. I remembered the time we talked in the flowers field when I had my journal with me.
Well, it is the only way to remember the littlest details of my life. Writing is the way to truly remember things.
"I guess you have a point." She agreed with me as she ran her finger around one of my ears. A few minutes after the silence enveloped us, she spoke again.
"You know what? We should go for a run together." She decided as she pulled Amoux's face away from her lap. She got up and went behind a tree. A few seconds later, a beautiful blonde wolf emerged.
You are beautiful mate. Amoux complimented her.
I bet my behind looks even better. Accalia, her wolf answered as she gave us a wolfish smirk before she took off running.
It seems mate wants us to chase her. My wolf's excitement reached its peak as he awaited my approval to do what he wanted.
Then a chase is what we will give her. Amoux gave me a growl of approval before he took off running following our mate's heavenly scent.
In that moment, I forgot about everything that troubled me just a minute before. I forgot about the warriors' deaths, I forgot about my fears, and I forgot about how much I hate traitors.