Balancing Love ☞︎ A Jesse St. James fan fic

I Will Not Become This Schools Prized Puppy...

That evening as everyone left, Jesse and I sat down on the couch as Rachel and Kurt cleaned up. I was way to exhausted to do anything.

Kurt walks back in the room after getting a phone call.

"That was Blaine. They lost." Rachel and I gasp.

"Oh, no." I say, thinking about Finn and this being his first teacher sectionals.

"Apparently, the new girl, Marley, passed out on stage and the warblers won." Kurt broke the news.

"Oh, my god. So, wait. That's... thats it then. What are they gonna do now?" Rachel asks.

"Well, they'll have to wait till next year to re-compete." Jesse voices. Kurt glances back at us.

"I don't know. I just feel bad for Blaine. If he was still with the warblers, he'd be on his way to regionals right now." Kurt said, hanging Rachel a salad bowl.

"You think I should call Finn?" Rachel asks.

"No." I respond.

"If you think it's gonna make him feel better." Kurt shrugs, walking over Jesse and I to grab stuff.

"No. I don't, actually. It'll probably just make him feel worse. Imagine coming down from one loss, only to be reminded of an even bigger one." Rachel says, coming over as well to pick up some glasses.

"HA!" Jesse laughs. I smack his chest, concealing a smile of my own.

"Well, our friends feelings aside, it's really woken me up to the idea of making the most of the chances that you have. You know? I've got one more chance of getting into NYADA, and I can't blow the audition." Kurt says as he and Rachel take stuff to the kitchen.

"It's not your last chance, ok? I mean you can still reapply." Rachel assures him.

"No. I can't live my life chasing something that the universe is trying to tell me that I'm no good enough to achieve." Kurt complains.

"It's not the universe. It's just Carmen Tibideaux." Rachel scoffs.

"Is there a difference?" Kurt and I ask at the same time. We glance at each other in amusement.

"Speaking of Carmen, has she started passing her golden tickets for the winter showcase yet?" Kurt asks.

"No, and it doesn't matter, because I'm not getting one. Alexandra Blasucci was the last freshman to get one in the last seven years, and she was practically raised on the broadway stage. Wait. How do you know about those tickets?" Rachel asks after her explaining. Kurt stops putting a record on and looks over to her as she walks to sit down at the table.

"I've become very active on the NYADA blogs." Kurt admitted, causing me to grimace.

"You still go on those?"

"I figured, the more I know, the better I can streamline my application and audition... The winter showcase is like the NYADA met ball. Ten students are invited to perform at the showcase a year. The cream of the cream. She handwrites and hand- delivers each invitation. Just getting invited is an honor. Former winners have gone on to win emmys, Tony's, golden globes, and even an Oscar. But they all agree, the proudest and greatest moment of their careers was when Carmen handed them that golden envelope." Kurt explained as we all somehow made our way to the table.

The next day at dance class, Rachel and I were at the barre stretching. I narrowed my eyes, noticing students moving out of the way for someone. Slowly. Very slowly.

Then out of the woodwork, came Carmen. She walked up to Rachel and I. Carmen stretched out her hand. Neither of us moved. Rachel turned her gaze and stared at me.