Beetlebum - Damon Albarn

8

July 3rd 1994

"No I don't want to go out." I groaned, curled up on my sofa in one of Liams t-shirt and shorts.

Liam and Noel were stood in front of my telly, trying to convince me to go out clubbing for my birthday.

"Why not? It's yer birthd'y for fucks sake." Liam rolled his eyes.

I stretched my limbs filling up all the space on the sofa, "I'm in mourning." I sighed.

"Mourning?" Noel raised an eyebrow, "Of what might I ask?"

"Brian Jones." Liam scoffed, leaving the living room, "And Jim Morrison!" I exclaimed to him as he left, sitting up with a defeated look on my face.

"I'm finding you something to wear." I heard him say from my room.

Noel threw himself down next to me, resting his arms on the back of the sofa, "You can't always spend yer birthdays moping about dead rockstars."

"I can if they died on my birthday." I mumbled to him, leaning back into his arms.

Within 5 minutes, Liam came out of my room holding some clothes. I sighed taking them off of him and going to get changed.

It was an ok outfit considering he lives his life in tracksuits.

He'd picked out a black dress with white flower patterns on that reached mid thigh, I discarded the tights he'd gotten and wore thigh high white socks.
I put on my black Adidas tracksuit jacket I always had on over to keep warm when outside and slipped on my Red Adidas gazelles.

I brushed through my straight shoulder length hair and came out of my room. I'd put on makeup earlier on in the day and wore my eyeliner smudged.

We left for the bus in no time, Noel said that the lads were meeting us at the Fridge as usual. It had quickly become our go to club in the short time of us being here.

We found out the day previous of the name chosen for the album, we'd settled on Definitely Maybe. Everyone was buzzing, the lads went out last night to celebrate but I decided to stay in, not wanting to interact with anyone.

Noel was right though, I couldn't spend my birthday moping over dead rockstars, although that's not the only reason I wasn't planning on celebrating, birthdays hadn't really been a celebration growing up. Due mostly to my mums inability to keep money in the bank.

We'd arrived at the club in no time. It was weirdly packed for a Sunday night. I quickly took off my jacket as the amount of people clustered in this club had caused the heat to rise.

As I sat with all the lads at a table we'd managed to get ahold of.

I stayed in a daydream whilst the world moved along, them all being in their own conversations.

It feels as though all I do is spend my time clubbing recently. Clubbing and sleeping around.

When my auntie called me this morning to wish me a happy birthday, she asked me what I'd been up to since her last call, I had nothing to say. I couldn't just explain to her that I may possibly have a crush on a boy I'd slept with who was in a committed relationship already.

Mum still hadn't rang. That was part of the reason I wanted to stay home. I'd probably miss her call depending on when I get home. I wondered what she was up to, if she was still with Rudd after everything.

I needed to stop thinking about Rudd. He'd been on my mind a lot. I don't know why, i thought I'd finally gotten over everything I went through with that.