Liar | Freddie Mercury

Chapter Fourteen

"Well, this place is an absolute mess, isn't it?!" Roger stared at the small recording room with wide eyes as we stepped through the door. He took a large step forward in an attempt to avoid walking all over Freddie's scattered papers. I glanced around the all too familiar room, not mentioning that I was there, with Freddie, the night before.

I cringed, pinching my eyes shut as images of Freddie's watery eyes and tear stained, red cheeks flashed through my mind. I could almost feel the heat of his body against mine as my lower back dug into the control table. The scent and taste of hard liquor still clear in my senses.

"It was Freddie, I found one of his songs ripped to shreds on the piano. He left a couple sheets with some pretty nasty lyrics all over the place." Larry sat at his control table, pointing towards the recording room.

"Bloody hell, well, let's hope he came up with something useful. C'mon, Rissa." Roger didn't seem to give it much thought, he had no clue that the only empty spot on Larry's table was the exact spot where Freddie and I betrayed him. He took my hand, leading my stiff body into the room as we waited for the rest of his band mates to show up for their recording session.

I was disgusted in myself, and mortified at the thought of what consequences could follow after my night with Freddie. I didn't know what to do anymore. Being Freddie's enemy was fine, at least I knew where I stood with him. Being his friend at times was even better, I got to know a side of him that I never expected. But now...Where do we even stand after that? What do I do?

Do I avoid seeing him? Do I pretend it never happened and just continue feeling this panic tightening up my chest? Do I talk to him about it? What if he hates me now... What if, in his mind, I'm the one to blame? What if he tells Roger that I'm the one that initiated the kiss?

This could harm the band! This could ruin his friendship with Roger! This could make me lose all of my new friends. What would Brian and Deaky think if they found out about this; would Veronica still want to go on that coffee date with me? I don't want to be lonely, not again... I've finally met a nice group of people, and I refuse to let Freddie and his chaotic behaviour ruin that for me!

I knew exactly what I had to do, Freddie and I had to have an adult conversation about the entire situation and set strict boundaries to make sure that nothing like that ever happened again.

"You alright, Ris? You've been awfully quiet this morning." Roger snaked his arm around my shoulders, planting a kiss against my temple as I looked around at the messy room.

It was even messier than when I left the night before. Freddie made sure to leave this room as messy as his emotions were.

Could I blame him for the state he was in last night? He found out that the girl he was in love with was cheating on him, the girl he was writing love songs for. He only kissed me in an attempt to feel anything other than broken.

Oh, Freddie. Why do you consume so many of my thoughts?

"I guess I'm just a little tired, that's all. I didn't get much sleep last night." I smiled at Roger, hoping that it seemed sincere.

"What? Too much going on inside that beautiful head of yours?"

Yes, thoughts of the sounds your best friend made while I had my fingers tangled in his hair.

"Yeah, just a bunch of uni work. Nothing too important." I shrugged, rubbing at my reddening cheeks.

"Jesus Christ! What storm hit this place?!" Brian shouted as he tripped over a pile of rubbish when him and Deaky entered the room, both of them stopping in their footsteps as their eyes scanned the place.