Finding Contentus

Chapter 51: Genesis

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Genesia felt heavy, cold, and anxious. He couldn't stop shivering and trembling, seeing the end of the world right before his eyes. Three separate times.

He could feel Rosari still sobbing and clutching onto him. The chills he got made him chill so much that—

He felt an immeasurable sense of chilled calmness.

No anger, no bitterness, no sadness, no fire, no light... nothing, far more than emptiness.

I'm fine. He thought. In truth, he wasn't fine. At all. In truth, he wanted nothing more than to have the tears come flooding down his eyes. To choke and cry over the hard truth of tragedy that Rosari said would come true as a fact.

She was right. She was undeniably right. Just as she was right about the primal gene. Everyone he knew and loved would die. He would die. That was the end. The fated fatal end of—

Ah — but that's life itself neh? Everything is destined and fated to die since birth. That isn't even a surprise really. The question is how they die and when they die. The real question is what their stories are before they die. The real question is what people do with their lives before they die. The real question is how people live before they die. Just like Ba Bona. Who lived the greatest lives and stories of all time.

"Hmm." Systematically, he began cracking and snapping all his joints that made distinct branch snapping sounds like cracks of lightning to a tree.

He blindly stood there for what felt like a lifetime, thinking, as Rosari kept weeping, pleading for them to leave Imagis and pleading for him to give up on his own life. To live with her instead. To die with her instead if needs be. That was the only way he could avoid such a fate. If he left her now, he would be cursed to go down that painful path.

He would succeed, and fail. He would live, and die. He would not have a happy life. He would continue to lose, and lose, and lose and lose and—

But Papa lived the same tragic life and still does live a tragic life that he carries on his damn back to be the rising and setting sun. Mama, uncle and aunty also lived the same life. Why can't I? Life is depressing. I've known this all along. Nothing has changed.

An infinite amount of ideas, memories, concepts, ideals and thoughts floated around inside his restless mind.

"To be dead on the inside, but to be alive on the outside. To deal and cope with the constant fated fatality of a destined destiny of death. Hmm... endless pain and suffering. Interesting... very interesting... that will make one hell of a story I rate."

He frowned. "The rise and fall of the cursed and blessed Gene and Neo. Ooooooo," he mimicked a whale-like merm sound. "That has a chilly ring to it."

He sounded unemotional. As though his tragic story was something logical to be recorded and written down rather than something to be horrified by that he would experience in time with what he had already experienced in time.

Rosari glanced up at him. She looked absolutely horrible, but still outrageously beautiful.

Genesia blinked, three times in succession as though he had suffered a concussion. Ah, then again, maybe I have lost my mind. Maybe my time on Mad Scar under Rosari's mad pull has succeeded in making me mad.

He gave a low chuckle, stretching his neck at the thought, not being surprised if such was true. Well, the whole world is mad too. But I'm immune so fuck the madness. I'm a different build by nature and nurture.

"You have gone mad, my Gene cure. You have gone mad just like the rest! Am I wrong? You know I am not wrong! You are not thinking straight or clearly! What person in their right mind would still follow such a path after they have found out the truth?" Rosari kept weeping and speaking at the same time.