I'll Be Your Strength. The Wanted Fanfic

17

I could feel myself falling asleep every so often. I literally have had no sleep the past week because of Robert; I know he can't help it but it's just tiring that's all. God knows how my mum feels though. Leah's leaving today to go back with the boys; she's told mum and Joe that they're actually doing brilliantly, they've built up a massive fan base; All Time Low went straight to number one. Every time she mentioned them, it hurt me; but most importantly, I feel as if she's rubbing it in because I haven't spoken to any of the boys and she's just saying it all because of how I dumped both Nathan and Jay, even though I wasn't technically going out with either of them, but according to Leah, Nathan's the favourite member.

As we were eating diner, I really didn't feel like eating, so I got my plate and put the food in the bin; I had only a little bit of food from it, literally about a mouth full, but everyone and everything was irritating me. I got upstairs, got changed into some old joggers, a tee then went back downstairs "Why did you change?" Mum asked "I'm gna go out!" I walked out without making eye contact with her. I took a slow walk to the park. As I approached it, a lot of memories started to come back to me. This used to be mine and Nathan's park, before it all changed; before he moved away, and before he changed.

I sat down on a swing and took a look at my surroundings; everything in my life keeps changing. It’s like I get extremely happy with what's in my life then, all of a sudden, it all gets taken away from me; I really do hate my life sometimes.

I must have stayed in the park for a while because it was starting to get a little dark, so I took a slow walk home, and I mean slow walk home.

I walked in and there was a suitcase by the door, I don't know if they heard me come in or not but everyone was in the kitchen, what I heard Joe say really did kill me, it's like I've just been punched in the chest. How could Nathan do this? Before the band he hated her, now he's gone and done this. I swear this boy always confuses me.

*2 months later: Christmas*

"So how's home life with your two amazing step sisters back?" Matt joked "Yano what? I love it; they've both been amazing company!" I groaned, I do try to be serious but it just fails. Matt is in sixth form at Sidney, he started there at the beginning of the year; he studies art, he's the only person I talk too, and I'm the only person he talks to aswell. He's also in my tutorial so we get to spend a lot of time together in school, except lessons obviously, but knowing we both just have that one friend we can talk to and help us to escape the others we call school students is brilliant; I love being able to have a friend in and out of school "You're going to love the present I got you! It's so.. Danielle!!" Matt laughed "Oh really, well you're going to love the present I got you too! It's so.. Matt!" I joked back.

As we were laying on the grass, I rolled over and faced him, Matt was one of them people where he looked perfect know matter what time of the day it was/what face he pulled; he had long blonde hair which covered majority of his forehead, he had deep brown eyes and probably the most gorgeous jaw line ever. He turned his head to face me "What's up?" He asked half smiling at me "Nothing, I just love being round you!" "Ahhh, nothing much then Hamilton!!" He laughed. I placed my head on his shoulder and we both lay watching the stars appear in the sky. As it's Christmas eve, I want to spend as much time with Matt as possible, because he spends his Christmas with his family at his nan and granddad’s house.

I don't know how long we were laying there for, but we lay in total silence. We normally lay in silence; it's never awkward between us, we just these silent moments. By now, it was starting to get pretty cold so we decided to walk home "I'm going to miss you Hamilton! Even though I'll see you in a few days!" Matt hugged into me really tightly as we came up to my house "I'm going to miss you too!" We stood there hugging each other for a while before we actually decided to go. I walked up the garden to my house and as I walked in I had to admit, it was pretty loud so I walked into the living room and guess who was in there? The Wanted; NATHAN SYKES IS IN MY LIVING ROOM, WHY? I looked round at everyone and stopped at my mum "How's Matt?" She asked. I kind of liked the fact she mentioned him, just to see what everyone's reaction would be like "Who's Matt?" Leah asked turning round to face me "Someone who you don't need to know!" I replied to Leah "He's fine!" I said to mum before walking off upstairs. The sight of them lads officially made me feel really sick and angry.

I sat down on my bed and let out a big sigh, I haven't told Matt about the whole Nathan and Jay situation, all he knows is that Leah is going out with Max so I'm kind of related to them. Knowing The Wanted personally has it's down points, like Matt's little sister is mentally and physically obsessed with them and she keeps asking if I can get their autographs. I know I personally know them, but doesn't mean I talk to them or even want to. The less contact I have with them the better!

I lay down on my bed and let out a big sigh before someone started to knock on my door, and guess who walked in, Nathan. How cosy this is, I let out another sigh and turned round so I wasn't facing him "Don't I get a hi or anything then?" He asked walking over and sitting down next to me, the urge to get up and punch him is so great right now "I take it you're not talking to me, do I get a reason?" He carried on; I stood up and looked at him. Damn it, I forgotten just how gorgeous this boy actually is, he's even had a haircut which made him look even better looking, his green eyes stood out by far I must admit. 'NO!' I told myself, I must stop myself from thinking this, I'm meant to be mad at him but instead I was reminding myself just how much I really liked this guy, I really don't want to admit this but him being in front of me made me realise just how much I actually miss him. I miss his company, the jokes we shared - the jokes that were nowhere near funny but somehow, we found it hilarious - all those good times we had. Now they're just memories, and he's just a stranger. How did this happen so fast? It's like all the time I've spent here has just flown by and I haven't even realised it.

I got so caught up in my thoughts that I forgot I was standing there; I was standing with tears in my eyes, how embarrassing is this? "Danielle, what's up?" Nathan asked looking pretty serious "Why the heck would you care?" I snapped at him with my voice getting quieter because of the lump in my throat "Danielle, what's wrong with you?" He asked again. I stood there and took a deep breath. I really didn't want to explain why I was crying; but to be honest, I really don't why know I'm crying. I do, it’s because I miss him and I never knew it, but I'm not going to explain that to him.

He's the one who hasn't bothered to keep in contact with me "Nothing, I'm fine! I just realised something that's all!" I eventually said hoping it'll be enough to persuade him "I see you've replaced me then?" He asked; I stood there in total confusion "Come again?" I asked "Matt, you've got a new mate. Or whatever he is to you, maybe he's your boyfriend? See, you're doing well without me" I couldn't help but to let out a big tut "That's rich coming from you! Didn't take you long to replace me either did it?" I sat down on a chair I have in my room; the look on his face was like he knew what I was on about "You know then?" He said looking pretty sorrowful "Nathan, you couldn't keep it a secret forever it was bound to come out. Also, I think you've forgotten one thing, I live with her relatives - unfortunately - but I'll live. Like, have you had a serious accident where you've been hit around the head really hard and you've woke up and suddenly, you're in love. In love with someone I thought you never would be in love with. Like, what persuaded you to even start a relationship with Nicole?" He placed his head in his hands and sighed "Dan, I'm sorry you didn't find out from me, in fact who told you?" I looked down at my lap "No one, I overheard Leah and Joe talking about it and how they didn't want me to know because they knew how I'd react to it!" "But you've reacted alrite! Actually you've reacted better than I thought; either you've had a personality transplant or you're plotting something in your head! Geez I literally can't make you out!" I looked over to him "Yeah well I've got better things to be doing then getting upset over a relationship between two people that don't concern me!" "What's that supposed to mean?" He asked "Nathan, I haven't seen or spoke to you in God knows how long, you don't expect me to still call you a friend? I'm not saying I should get a call or see you every day, but I just really can't be bothered anymore! We've clearly moved on with our lives and even though I really enjoyed having you in mine, you're too busy with other things to stay in my life, and you're better off doing what you're doing! Now can you just go please?" Why did I just say all of this? I don't want him to go, I want him to stay.

He stood up and walked over to me "Danielle.." He began before leaning down in front of me "You don't know anything! You really don't, if only hey?" He got up and walked out of my bedroom "Oh by the way, I do think about you! I still care about you, a lot. But things happened" he looked over to me before walking out.

What did he mean by 'I don't know anything'? Is he just trying to make this situation worse or something? Damn this boy.