The Perfect Drug (Ariana/You)

Chapter 17

I had cried myself to sleep. 

Fell asleep, for what seemed like only an hour, woke up crying again and I wasn't even sure why. I shouldn't be feeling this way about Ariana. 

Usually, I would manage to keep it all in, but this time too much things were on my mind and I could not cope with it anymore. I was curled up in a ball underneath my duvet as to isolate the rest of the world. I loved having this space to think. I had no idea what time it was, if it was still night time or day time.

A slight knock was heard from the other side of my door.

"Y/N, can I come in?" It was Dominique.

"Sure." I could not find the strength to put any emotions into my words.

The door slightly opened as I poked my head out of under the duvet to look at the door and saw Dominique's head sticking out of my bedroom door. When she saw it was okay to come in, she opened the door more and I saw she was holding two cups of hot cocoa.

I smiled at the gesture and suddenly felt like a kid again.

"Thought you may need this as you haven't been out of that room since Ariana left yesterday evening." Dominique said and she sat right next to me on the bed. She placed the two hot cups of cocoa on the bedside table.

Had I really been crying and under this duvet over night? I guess my mind really did go on overdrive.

"What time is it? Is mom back safe at the center?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to know.

"It's a little past 11am Snorlax. And yes, of course she is. Do you think I'd be here if she wasn't?" I chuckled.

"So I guess your talk with Ariana didn't go really well?" Dominique asked, straight to the point. I shook my head silently.

"I could tell. She was already nearly crying when she came to say bye to your mom." Dominique said as she kept her eyes on me. I remained silent.

"You need to get out from under these covers, girl. No matter what happened or what was said, you gotta get right back up and keep moving. Moping isn't going to solve your problems." She said to me.

I loved her for that. She was never afraid of calling me out. She was right, I did need to get my shit together and solve the problems I had. Right now they were called Ariana and Courtney.

"You like her don't you?" Dominique caught me by surprise with those words.

I turned to sit up and grab the hot chocolate, slowly bringing it to my lips, testing the warmth first as to not burn myself.
I don't know if I was ready to get into my feelings.

"You don't have to say it, I know you do. The way you two connect is very visible even to a blind person."

"I'm with Courtney." That was the only thing I could say.

Dominique seemed hesitant and she went to say something but quickly stopped. She then looked at me and sighed.

"Y/N, gotta tell you something. I promised your mom I wouldn't but I can't keep it a secret for much longer." She started and I instantly became panicked.

If this was bad news, I really did not have the strength to hear it. I grew very nervous watching her struggle to find words on how to start saying what she needed to say.

"Your mom and I are together, Y/N. I really love her."

I was at a loss for any words whatsoever and felt my jaw drop. I had no idea, not even suspected anything going on.

Dominique noticed that I was not saying anything and she was getting extremely nervous.

"I've loved your mom even while your dad was still alive. I've had to watch the woman who I found out over time to be the love of my life, love another man while I pretended to be happy in my own marriage. Don't get me wrong, Robert was a kind man and a great dad, but he was not who I loved in that way."