This Town Called Nowhere

Chapter 3: Our World Nowhere

3

Showers are supposed to make me not think about anything, but when the cold water runs down, Mom's words are all that's in my head.

Everytime I lose it's always like this. She ignores me and when she talks to me, she says something new and different about my existence. Sometime soon, she'll definitely tell me she hoped she didn't get pregnant, or that she regretted meeting my dad.

I clench my hands into fists when I turn up to greet the water with my face. I've had enough of this. Biting my lip, I ball my hands harder, then vent out my anger to the wall until they bleed. I stop when my fists turn numb. I don't even bother finishing shower. I walk out, naked and wet, and put on any clothing I see first in the closet.

When I go down, there's no one. They already left for work. There is breakfast on the table, but my appetite's not in a good place at the moment. Grabbing the keys, I walk out of the house and lock it. Then I start to run.

I don't know where I'm going. Anywhere I can vent my anger out, probably. But as I run longer and faster, I find myself going through the streets to Cassey's.

Her family lives in a subdivision near the border of Blue Ridge Valley and Rosenberg. Unlike our plain, formal, too Mom-like street, theirs have a more homey touch of architecture to it. Somehow, their neighborhood is Dad-like. Their house is the third one from the first corner, and as I veer my way around, Mr. La Torre gets out of his car and walks inside.

I don't know what Mom told Cassey. I've convinced myself that's why I'm here, to know what Mom told her. But when her dad feels my presence and turns to me, his face turns dark and immediately shuts the door. If I remember correctly, her dad likes me. But given his reaction and Mom, I'm not sure anymore.

It's not only Cassey, I think to myself and ring the doorbell. For a minute, no one answers. Then I ring it again. When I ring it the third time, her mom, Mary, greets me with an indifferent smile.

"Neil."

Her dad grumbles inside and Mary turns to him and tells him to stop. Looking over her shoulder, I wander my eyes around their house, but Cassey is nowhere to be seen.

"Mary, is Cassey home?"

"Where else should she be, O'Donnell?!" her dad grumbles, strides to me, pulls me inside by the collar, and pushes me against the wall.

"Henry!"

"I've had enough of you rich bastards," he spats to my face and I turn my head down. "Believe me, I thought you were different, but you're all just the same."

Mary is crying out to him to stop, but he pushes me even harder to the wall. When I look up, he has tears in his eyes, but still, his anger is flaring. "You can't just promise us to set Junior free, then take it back with a blackmail!" He punches the wall beside my head and I flinch.

Cassey is on the stairs when I open my eyes. For a minute, she stares at me, then runs back up again. I sigh.

Mr. La Torre takes a step back as Mary calms him down, somehow. She tells me to go, but I stand before them, my head down. In behalf of my family, especially Mom, I say, "I'm sorry, sir, Mary."

"Get out of here, son. I tell you, get outta here now."

Mary nods desperately. Sighing, I walk  myself out. I look up to Cassey's room, and there she is, peeking out the window. But, she retreats when she sees me. I try to call her, but it goes straight to voicemail.

"I'm sorry. Everything's my fault. I," I sigh, "I'll try to talk to her, Cassey. I am so sorry. I'll fix this. I promise I'll fix this . . . Call me back please, we both need someone to talk to." I leave the message in her voicemail, in hopes she'll listen to it.