Placebo Girl

Chapter 20

Alex ignores his brother and takes his shot, waving to Tony again. Luke huffs under his breath and turns to me. His eyes are brilliant under the light and mine flick down to his lips. They're perfectly pink and full. I long to kiss them in this moment but Luke grabs my hand, distracting me.

"Do you want to dance with me?" he asks.

My heart swells and I can't help but to crash my lips against his forcefully, grabbing his face in my hands. His lips immediately respond to mine and pretty soon, ours are both moving in sync. I can't tell if it's the music pounding from the speakers or my heartbeat pounding through my body, but I'm pretty sure it's both.

I pull Luke closer, deepening the kiss, not caring who is watching. It's so unlike me and I feel free, liberated here with him.

Pretty soon, Luke is dragging me across the dancefloor, not stopping until we get to the front where the music is so intense that I can't hear myself think. I don't care. I throw my hands around Luke's neck and allow my body to move naturally to the rhythm of the club music. He smiles fondly at me and my heart and mind swarms with too much to comprehend. I understand him too much now. I finally feel like I can empathize with his situation and I now know what's it like to be so desperate for someone else's happiness. I feel it with him.

I don't understand the depths of my feelings for Luke, how they happened and what they mean, but I know that I care about him so much that it might be dangerous.

All the sudden, I'm being pulled forward, losing myself in another kiss as we move to the beat of the music, our bodies acting like they're connected, making up one whole person. I'm all too aware of his hands at my waist, travelling lower. I reach behind my back, pushing them up playfully.

"Can't I touch my girlfriend's ass...ets?" He yells.

"Not in public," I yell back, grinning.

He nods but does it again. When he does, he plays dumb, his eyes darting around the room. I smile at him, tugging lightly at his curls, which finally makes him look my way again. When he does, I stop pulling, resting my hand loosely in his curls. I swear I'll never forget the feeling of them between my fingertips.

"Hey, Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you," I say, growing serious with him.

"For what?"

His hand cradles my cheek and his eyes are so intense that I almost look away. I don't.

"For this, for being here for me," I say, "This whole trip, I just really appreciate that you want to share it with me."

I watch him gulp down a breath. He looks nervous as he glances down at his feet. I tangle my fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, trying to get him to look at me.

"I...um...well...I..." he says, stuttering over his words.

He takes a deep breath and I'm confused. He looks like he's struggling to say anything, like he's scared of something. I tug on his arm, giving him a reassuring smile. His face reflects the orange light of the dancefloor, but I can still tell that his cheeks flush a light pink. I reach up to run my finger over a few faint freckles on his nose. He's beautiful, even in this anxious state.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Well, I just...I want you to know something."

"Okay," I say and laugh, "what is it?"