it's so lonely here

Exposure Therapy

Emma's POV
"How are you feeling today?" Hailey asked. I wasn't in the mood for therapy, especially so early in the morning. After the ordeal last night I felt on edge. I got the vibe that Juliet wasn't going to tell anyone what happened but I couldn't trust her yet. She seemed like the type of person that was on a mission to fend for themselves and would toss anyone aside if it got in her way. I was nervous she'd hold that moment against me and use it if I pissed her off. I noticed Hailey writing in her notebook and decided I should probably answer. " I'm fine, kind of tired though," I hoped that would be enough but of course it wasn't, this was therapy. "Let's elaborate more. What are you actually feeling? Did you have a chance to talk with your new roommate, how do you feel about her?" "Oh Juliet? Yeah she seems really cool. I think we'll get along just fine," Hailey nodded and continued writing. "Okay, I'm getting the feeling that you're not in the headspace to open up so why don't we go and try some exposure therapy." "What's exposure therapy?" I questioned. Whatever it was it sounded terrifying. "During your intake assessment I wrote down some triggers for you and we are going to tackle them head on. This will help you learn to cope with those emotions you have in stressful situations. We won't start off too hard, but I have here that one of your triggers is being around large groups of people. I thought taking you to the mall might be a good place to start. It's not too crowded but enough people to constantly be surrounded. Why don't you get ready and we will plan to head out in an hour, okay?" "Okay. Yeah that's fine," how bad could it be? I used to love shopping and malls aren't too scary. "Oh I just have one question," I quickly asked. "Yes?" "Can Ethan come?"

Ethan's POV
I was getting out of the showering when my phone started buzzing, it was Emma. I rushed over to it and quickly answered. "Hey, babe, are you okay? Do you need anything? What's up?" "Hey yeah everything's fine," she answered and a wave of relief passed over me, "I was just wondering if you wanted to meet me at the mall today. I'm doing this thing called exposure therapy and I wanted you to be there. I also just really miss you." I felt a twinge in my heart. As much as I loved that Emma was getting the help she needed I missed her every single day. "Yes I'll meet you there, I can't wait to see you sweet cheeks. It's not the same here without you." We said our goodbyes and quickly got ready to head over to the mall. I could wait to see her, hug her, kiss her, everything. After getting dressed I headed to the kitchen to grab my keys and leave. "Where are you off to?" Grayson asked as I passed the living room. "I'm going to the mall and meet up with Emma for therapy," I called from the kitchen as I searched for my keys, "don't know when I'll be back but shouldn't be too long." "Sounds good, tell her I say hey," he yelled back.

....

I was sitting on a bench when I saw her. It's hard to describe the feeling inside of me but I felt something explode. The pure excitement I was experiencing made me sprint to be by her. "E!" She called as I ran up to her and it embraced her in a hug. She wrapped her legs around me and whispered in my ear, "I missed you." I squeezed her tighter before letting her down. "How are you feeling today?" I asked hoping she'd give me a real answer. "Okay, kind of nervous but really happy you're here." I smiled and intertwined our fingers. "If you guys are ready to get started I think we should begin," Hailey called from behind us. "Ready?" I looked at em. "Yeah, I'm really glad you came, thanks," she said as we started walking.

Emma's POV
Words couldn't describe how thankful I was that Ethan was here with me. Hailey promised we would go easy so I tried to settle my anxiety without anyone noticing. The goal was to just spend an hour at the mall, surrounded by people, without having a panic attack. Sounds easy enough. Ethan and I went from store to store, laughing and looking at random shit. It felt amazing to be with him and see his smile light up his face. It's been so long since I've seen that smile. "E you gotta try on these!!" I said grabbing a pair of thigh high boots. "Em, really?" He said while giggling. "It'd make me super duper happy," I said while giving him puppy dog eyes. "Ha super duper happy, Huh? Well then I gotta do it," he spun me around quickly pecked a kiss on my cheek. I could feel my face turn red and handed him the heels. He zipped them up and damn, his legs. I was nearly at a loss for words. "What'd ya think?" He said while turning to the side to show off his calves, "hot right?" He winked. "Maybe, but let's see you walk in those first," I said as I started to back up. "Where do you think you're going?" He laughed as he lunged for me. "Ah!" I giggled as I ran over to the sweaters. "Hey you know you want me," he said as we circled around a clothing rack. "I do?" I joked. "Ohhhh baby, you do," he smirked as he got closer. I slowly walked backwards, not breaking eye contact when he lunged. "Ha ha! Looks like you're stuck with me now!" He laughed as we crashed onto the floor. "Oh darn, whatever will I do," I said as I gazed into his eyes. If only I could stop and lay here forever. "Hey let's get up before we kicked out," he said as he pulled off the floor. "This has been a really good day. Thank you for coming," I said once we were standing up. He wrapped his arms around me whispered, "I'm glad to see you happy again." I gave him a small smile and turned around to head out the door. Just as I was about to leave I bumped into a group of teens. "Oh god I'm so sorry I wasn't looking where I was going." "Oh my god! It's Emma Chamberlain!" One of them screamed. "And Ethan Dolan??" Another added. I tried to give and quick smile and look for Ethan but I was suddenly surrounded by people. They all whipped their phones out and started recording. I kept trying to find Ethan, spinning around and circles frantically trying to locate him but I couldn't see past the avalanche of teens. They were crowded around me chanting my name asking me what I was doing, if I was coming back to YouTube, what happened to me, why I was in rehab. My mind felt like mush. I couldn't think, all I needed to do was find Ethan. "E! E! Ethan where are you? E can you hear me? Somebody help me!" I felt so helpless and just collapsed into a ball on the ground as the flashes of phones progressively got closer to my face. This was suppose to be an easy outing. It was going so well. I was so close to being done. And now all I wanted was to be with e.

Ethan's POV
I was pushed by one of the girls and fell backwards onto my back. I quickly ripped off the heels I was wearing and searched for Emma. There were so many girls. At least 40 surrounding her and more coming in every moment. All of them were screaming her name which made it nearly impossible to hear anything. "Ethan we need to do something!" Hailey yelled as she came running over. "This isn't good. This isn't good at all," she kept saying and she tried to push her way through the crowd. Suddenly I got a glimpse through the sea of people and saw a small, terrified looking Emma curled up in a fetal position, crying with her hands blocking her ears. She looked so broken and I was not about to let her lay there any longer. "Move! Get away from her! Seriously back off!" I screamed and I pushed my way through. "Emma! Em! Emmy! Baby I'm coming!" I yelled as I finally reached her. I quickly scooped her up and ran out of the store towards my Jeep with Hailey close behind. I felt like I was moving in autopilot. My body was in fight or flight mode but all my mind could think was what the fuck just happened.

AUTHORS NOTE: hey here's the next chapter please please let me know if it's okay! Ily!!