On Thin Ice

31

"Elijah," he said again, standing over me and looking down at my tearful, blotchy face. "Are you okay?"

I couldn't help but start laughing, which only caused him to look more concerned. Tears continued to leak from my eyes in a constant stream while I laughed. Sobs ripped through my throat in between my laughter. I didn't know what this was, but it felt so unnatural.

"No," I said once my laughter stopped and my cries continued. "I'm not okay."

"What's wrong?" Micah asked in a gentle tone, sitting down beside me as I sat up and stared straight ahead.

"My life is fucked up and it's my fault," I answered in a raspy tone. "Not that it matters that much to you."

"Yes it does," he instantly replied.

I didn't respond.

"What are you doing here?" he asked after a few moments of silence.

"What are you doing here?" I still didn't look at him.

"Locking the church," he said. "It was my parents' night to do it but they're gone for the weekend."

"I don't actually care," I told him with an eye roll, swiping my hands across my cheeks to wipe my tears.

"We can't stay here," Micah said, ignoring my comment. "If you want we can—"

"I'm not going to your house," I abruptly cut him off.

"I was going to say we could go get something to eat," he countered. "You're obviously worked up and don't have anywhere else to go. If you did, you wouldn't be here."

I hated that he knew me and I despised that I actually agreed to go with him.

"So..." Micah trailed as he pulled out of the church parking lot, "You walked all the way here?"

I rested my head on the window, staring straight ahead. My eyes still stung from the tears I cried. I didn't want to even look at myself and see how swollen they would be.

"I don't have a car," I said in a bland tone. "The one I had got taken from me when I got kicked out of my house."

I saw Micah wince out of the corner of my eye.

"Your dad didn't get you one?" he wondered.

"I technically share with Josh."

"Oh, right. I forgot he's the same age as us."

We didn't speak for the rest of the ride and for that, I was grateful. Speaking to Micah felt so wrong . He may be able to act like nothing happened with us, but I couldn't.

I didn't pay attention to where we were going until Micah pulled into the parking lot of a restaurant. I had never been here, but I assumed it was somewhere he was familiar with.

I followed Micah into the restaurant and we were seated right away. There was barely anyone in there, but then again, it was quite late. The staff probably hated us for coming in this late.

As soon as we were sitting, I picked up my menu to avoid having to speak to Micah. I could feel his stare on me like it was burning into my skin, but I paid him no mind.

"Hi, my name is Ian, I'll be your server," the waiter said when he walked up to the table. My eyes instantly shot up to meet Ian's, who looked completely miserable as he stared back down at me.

"Ian? What are you doing here?" I stupidly asked.

He rolled his eyes. "I work here, dipshit. What do you want to drink?"