My Inner Demons But On Crack

An Exception

A/N: Since I've gotten 50k views, and 4k views I made this chapter jam-packed with incorrect quotes hope you enjoy it!

. . .

Leif: Just once I want a childhood memory that I don't have to repress.

. . .

Leif: Dear Diary, my teen angst bullshit has a body count.

. . .

*When Ava introduces the daemos to Truth or Dare*

Ava, to Pierce: I dare you-

Rhys: Pierce isn't allowed to accept dares.

Pierce: Apparently, I have "no regard for my personal safety".

. . .

Rhys, to Leif: I was taught to think before I act.

Rhys: So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured I thought about it, and I'm confident in my decision.

. . .

Rhys: How long does your ideal hug last?

Noi: Thirty to forty-five minutes.

Rhys: That seems very impractical.

Noi: You said ideal, not realistic.

. . .

Leif: Why do you have to be so tall?!

Pierce: Would you prefer me on my knees?

Leif: What.

Pierce: What.

. . .

Leif, points a sickle at Pierce's throat: On your knees, now.

Pierce, kneels: You do realize, that by you standing and me kneeling, everyone will think we are kissing. And while you may not care for your reputation, this is extremely embarrassing for me. I have far better taste in men.

. . .

Pierce: Many people that appear "cool" actually struggle with feelings of inadequacy. Not me. I have those feelings without appearing cool at all.

. . .

Pierce: I don't need friends, they disappoint me.

Rhys and Noi, exist:

Pierce:

Pierce:

Pierce: They're an exception.

. . .

Noi: Is that a hickey?

Pierce: No, it's a mosquito bite.

Noi: Uhuh, if you say so.

Leif: *Walking in* What's up-

Noi: Hey, mosquito.

. . .

Noi: *Getting dressed* Where the hell is my top?

Rhys: *Not looking up from his book* Lorelei's in the kitchen getting a drink.

Noi:

Rhys:

Lorelei: *Wheezing noises*

. . .

Ava: Woah, why are your tongues purple?

Pierce: I had a blue slushie-

Leif, in the background: And I had a red one!

. . .

Rhys, screaming in Daemos language:

Ava: I don't know what he's saying but I'm too scared to ask.

. . .

Ava, doing literally nothing:

Noi: Alexa play god is a women.

. . .

Asch: I'm... grounded?!

Pierce: Yes, you're grounded.

Asch: You can't ground me! I'm an adult.

Rhys: You disobeyed an order!

Pierce, holding a shovel: And now, we're gonna bury you until you've learned your lesson!

Asch: That's not how grounding works!

. . .

Asch: Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest, that just sounds nice and cozy, but if I invite you to my cabin in the woods, you're gonna die.

Ava: My favorite is explaining the difference between a "butt dial" and a "booty call."

Rhys: It's called connotations.

Leif: Try this one for size: "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned" or "Sorry daddy, I've been naughty"

Pierce: Great news! Talking is now banned.

. . .

Asch, rolling down the window: What seems to be the problem, officer?

Ava: Get the fuck out of my car.

. . .

kinda a continuation of the slushie one but kinda not.

Leif: Bro-

Pierce: I had your tongue in my mouth five minutes ago, don't you fucking dare call me "bro."

. . .

Asch: Why don't humans have a specific noise that means "there are bees here, let's leave immediately". Why are elephants more advanced than them?

Ava: We do have a specific noise, it sounds like this: "there are bees here, let's leave immediately".

. . .

Asch: Mistakes were made.

Rhys: By you.

Asch: And people got hurt.

Rhys: By you!

. . .

Noi: Guys Halloween just ended so that means Christmas must be next week!

Ava: For the record I celebrate Thanksgiving so plEASE SHUT UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE WITH MY TURKEY UNTIL AFTER NOVEMBER.

. . .

Rhys: I am at a loss for words!

Asch, narrating: Despite being at a loss for words, Rhys yelled at me for the next ten minutes.