Malfunction (ZaDr)

Chapter 1

Zim paced back and forth in his home contemplating what his next plan was for taking over Earth and preparing it for the Irken Armada. It was another average day, Gir was running around screaming about pizza and causing mayhem as he usually did. 

It had been years since Zim was sent to Earth to conquer it, he was growing up with Dib, pestering him and trying to make him look like a fool in front of their peers. It was really the only thing Zim did up to this point, but things were getting lonely. They were in Hi Skool now, and Dib had more important things in mind. Instead of chasing aliens and bigfoot, he was studying hard in the field of science to please his nagging father who spoke about nothing other than science. Dib slowly began to ignore Zim's shenanigans and stupidity because, after all, it's not like he could actually conquer Earth because if he could, he would've done it by now. Leaving Zim desperately trying to come up with plans that he claimed were to take over the planet when deep down, he was trying to get Dib's attention and bring back the past, which he missed more than he cared to admit.

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Zim entered the classroom and saw a seat open next to Dib who was in the back left corner of the classroom and sat down hoping that Dib would notice him, he didn't even look up. 

"Why hello there Dib-stink!" Zim greeted while smirking.

No answer.

"Eh- Dib?" Zim tried to get Dib's attention once more.

"What do you want, Zim? I'm kinda busy right now."

Zim opened his mouth but was unable to find words.  Why did he want Dib's attention exactly? There was no need for it, after all, Dib was nothing but a nuisance, just a squak in his shmoopsquiz. Zim awkwardly fiddled with his thumbs and stared straight ahead waiting for the class to begin. Zim did not need to pay attention, but he did anyway because he had nothing else to do in class to pass the time. He went to skool because it was a part of his elaborate disguise as a normal human boy child. 

He decided to write a note telling Dib how dumb and stinky he was to pass the time, so he did. Once he was done he slid it on Dibs desk in front of his face just to be sure that he would see it. Dib rolled his eyes and sighed as he opened up the note reading all of the overused insults he was used to hearing. 

"Can you not?" He said in annoyance while crumbling up the note. 

"Dib, Zim, Stop talking to each other and pay attention for once." The teacher ordered.

Dib rolled his eyes once again and continued to watch the teacher write algebraic equations on the whiteboard and copy them onto a sheet in his notebook. 

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The dismissal bell finally rang and Zim walked out of the building rushing to his home base. He needed to call the Tallest for yet another one of his daily reports. Zim rushed through the door and began to pull off his wig and remove his contacts while Gir and his robotic parents greeted him. 

"Computer! Call the Tallest, I need to file my daily report!" He ordered.

"Calling the tallest..."

There was a brief pause before they answered his video transmission. 

"Yes, Zim?" Purple asked in slight annoyance. 

"My Tallest! I have called to report how my day went." 

"Yes, we know Zim." Red rolled his eyes.

"Today I haven't made too much progress because it was just another day sitting through boring hi skool and trying to bother Dib, but it's strange... He doesn't seem to care about my plans anymore..." Zim's antenna began to droop down at the sides of his head.

"We don't care either Zim," Red responded with less patience.

"Don't worry though, I will make you both proud! I am your finest invader after all!" 

"About that," Purple started.

"What are you doing?" Red looked at Purple with concern.

"This is getting painfully sad and it's a waste of our time, we've had our fun, we should tell him." 

"Tell me what?" Zim asked, but was ignored. 

"I guess you're right," Red admitted. 

"Zim, you are nowhere near our finest invader, you are a defect- a malfunction if you will." Purple explained.

Zim could feel his body shaking as those words echoed through his head... He was never a good invader... He was never important... He meant nothing... He, the mighty Zim, was useless. 

"We sent you to Earth to get rid of you, I mean, we thought it was obvious everyone hates you, Zim." Red finished.

Zim felt his eyes become wet and his vision grew blurry. He felt weak in the knees and his thoughts were racing. 

"P-please my Tallest give me a real mission... I can prove to you guys I'm not a mistake I promise! I am Zim! I-" Zim pleaded.

"Enough, Zim. We aren't giving you a mission, whatever you decide to do with Earth is your business. Just please do not contact us again." Purple said before ending the transmission. 

Zim fell on his knees and wept. He felt purposeless, humiliated, nothing more than a failure and a joke. He had no worth to anyone, no allies, nothing. 

"What's wrong master?" Gir poked Zim's side. 

Zim couldn't respond properly to Gir. He was choking on his sobs and hyperventilating. All he could do was reach for Gir and pull him into a hug. The little robot, who he was sure was void of any real emotion, was the only one he could count on, the only one who might care.