The Middle - Volume Three ✔️

Chapter 61 (Patrick)

Turns out the Jack was a bad idea after all. By the time we're leaving the Grill, I'm less than sober. So much so, that my guard has slipped a little. I'm letting my unhappiness shine through, which is not okay. Because Jay has noticed.

"Dude, is everything okay with you?" He asks me quietly as we walk over to Jamie's. Yeah. I'm going over to Jamie's, because Jay's staying there, and I love her god damned dog. She isn't even in the country and still I can't seem to stay away.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking." I reply, my tone bristling with the contrary.

"Talk to me, man. We're bros. Always have been. I know you aren't fine." Jay says softly. I don't answer him, I just shake my head in silent defeat.

"Look, I'm sorry I freaked out when you said you were taking time away from the band. I overreacted. I thought the whole teaching thing was bullshit, but I can see now - it's more. There's something else going on with you, isn't there?"

He's being so serious, and so sincere. Is this it? Is this the moment I finally tell J1 that I've pretty much been in love with J2 since the day he introduced me to her? He might yell. He might lash out. I might end up with a busted lip and some bruises. But, maybe it's time for all of that, finally.

"I like someone." I blurt out. I'm blaming the Jack.

"Okay." He doesn't falter at all. It's almost like he was expecting me to say that just now. "I understand why that's bothering you, but it doesn't need to. Take it from me, P. There's nothing better than love. I know that's probably a far cry from whatever you're feeling, but you'll get there some day. And when you do. You'll never look back."

He raises his arms like what you gonna do? and offers me a small smile which I don't return. He can't give me advice on this, not real advice. Not without all of the facts.

"Jay." I start, already scolding myself for what I'm about to say. "I think I am in love."

Now this surprises him. Of course it does. And the worst part is, there's no think about it. I know I'm in love. But he doesn't need to know that.

"Okay, wow." He says, his eyes wide. He's stopped walking now. "Fuck."

He's at a loss of course. So I stop walking too, and wait.

"Jesus, dude. I didn't realise things with Amanda were that serious."

Amanda? What the fuck? Why does everyone think I like Amanda?!

Well it's obvious really. Because I've slept with her, and I took her out on one date. But since then, we've been hanging as friends. Just friends. I guess I haven't exactly told the guys that, though. What do I do? Do I let him think I'm in love with Amanda? Or do I set him straight?

"It's not Amanda."

His eyebrows shoot up his forehead even further.

"What? But you've been dating her? How the hell could you be in love with someone else? I don't get it?" He is beyond confused, naturally.

"It's hard to explain." I start, shaking my head. "But Amanda and I are just friends. She's... She's been giving me advice, sort of."

He looks absolutely baffled now. He's probably wondering why I would seek advice from some random chick I fucked a couple times instead of my best friends.

"She figured it out on her own." I lie. "She knew I liked someone else, so she's been helping me with it. It's been good. Good to get a female perspective on things."

He frowns at me, and fuck. I know exactly what he's thinking now.

"If you wanted a female perspective on this, you could have talked to Erin, or your mom, even Sarah. But there's one female I thought you'd wanna talk to above the rest."