Forgotten Past

Once this is over

Chapter 10

I could see P'Arthit standing in front of his car so I jogged over. He glanced at me. "How are you here?"

"Well just like you, I wanted to come and visit Puna because I was worried."

His face turned annoyed, "why would you be worried, what does it have to do with you."

"Puna is my friend?" I shook my head, "I know she is your girlfriend P'Arthit and it's okay that I like her as a person and I am concerned for her even if—"

"Okay," he cut me off as if he couldn't stand to hear anymore. "Fine, I'm here now so you can go."

"What are you planning to do?" he didn't respond. "Are you planning to wait outside all night?"

"I need to know that she is alright," he said. He looked so honestly worried that my heart jerked in agitation. Is he in love with her? He told me that they only started dating a few months ago. Was that enough time to fall in love with someone? Eight years hadn't been enough to stop loving P'Arthit, no matter how hard I tried, I was just too deeply in and I couldn't get out and it hadn't taken all that long for me to fall in love with him in the first place.

I didn't ask him this and decided to follow along with him. "Okay, I do too. If you want to wait then I'll wait with you."

"Kongpob," he groaned and looked sideways at me.

"I am not going to speak if that will make it better but I am not leaving." He shifted his feet and looked at his car. I was worried he would leave after all but then he leaned on it and we stayed there silently.

He didn't say one word for many minutes. I didn't have the luxury to not talk to him. In three days I would be leaving. I know I have been looking forward to it but each time I remembered how soon it would be my stomach drops. "P'Arthit, "I said, "you didn't go home before coming here. Aren't you hungry?"

"A little," he responded immediately. I smiled.

"Should I get you something to eat?"

"No," he said.

"P'Arthit, I know how you feel about me, I know that you can't stand me because I do things that make you mad, but I am leaving soon. You won't have to see me anymore so at least, don't shut me out until then."

He exhaled, "I am not trying to shut you out, or whatever you are thinking. This is just easier for me than..." he stopped, "I can't be like you and just do whatever I want without worrying about the repercussions."

"Why? It's easy," I smiled and took his hand in mine jokingly. "I guess it makes me a bad person." The smile slowly faded from my face.

He was looking at our hands then he shook his head,
"no, you are not. I'm sorry that I pushed you away all this time." I don't know what shocked me more, that he said that or the fact that he was letting me touch him and not pull away. We didn't talk about it and I pretended not to remember but I do remember what happened two nights ago in my car. P'Arthit had rejected me as he should. I never should have kissed him.

"If you are feeling this way does that mean we can see each other without any ill feelings from now on."

He glanced at me and didn't answer back but I took it as an okay. I don't know why P'Arthit was being agreeable, especially how we left things last night. Maybe it was the fact that he wouldn't have to deal with me much longer soon. I let the thought go before it hurt me. I won't be that foolish person from last night who couldn't take a hint already. I will stay with P'Arthit for a little bit and then leave.