Alone... A Bad Boy and His Kitten

Chapter 26

We were still driving. This was a very long drive. It felt like he is driving somewhere to dump my body. All around were nothing but the road and trees. He was silent the whole time. I was silent the whole time. My mind is racing. This is going to be the most important conversation of my life and I had no idea what it was going to be about. A lot of ideas are running through my head but Im not 100% sure what I will say and especially what he will say. 

Aidan brings me out of my thoughts, "Were here Kitten."

I come back to reality and take a look around me. We are sitting in the car staring at a beautiful scenery. We were on top of a hill and we saw mountains, trees and a river. I am mesmerized by the view.

Aidan chuckles, "Like the view?"

I nod but I continue starring out the window.

Aidan huffs, "Kitten I knew you'd like it here but we have to talk."

My heart is about to come out of my chest because I become nervous. He sees that and grabs my face and turns my face to face his. We are back to staring at each other. 

A moment of silence.

Another moment of silence.

And another.

Feels like eternity now.

Aidan breaks it and whispers, "Kitten, you shouldn't have come over last night. We shouldn't have kissed."

I break free from his hold on my face, "What? Why?!"

He looks straight, out the window, at the scenery, "It was a mistake. We can't do that."

Im confused, "Why not?"

He looks like he wants to say something but is holding back. He keeps opening and closing his mouth.

I decide to interject, "Aidan, you brought me here on this long as drive to this beautiful scenery and now you're shutting down. I want you to stop, look at me and continue what you're trying to say. Wait, scratch that. I want you to stop saying what you were saying and tell me that were going to be okay."

The whole time that I am talking, he is looking down at his lap. 

When I finished he smiled, a smile that wasn't happy or fake but a smile that I couldn't understand. 

He took a deep breath, looked up from his lap and finally began to talk, "Kitten I want us to forget yesterday ever happened. We shouldn't have done anything because it was wrong ."

"Aidan why do you keep repeating yourself? I don't think we did anything wrong. I mean we barely did anything. Wait. Just wait. I see what it is. You must not like me or something. Or it was bad, wasn't it???  I....I...I... mean you didn't have to drive all the way here to tell me that. I mean I get it.....we're not in the same.........league...."

Aidan interrupts, "WHAT? No. Kitten its not like that. It was definitely not bad, the quite opposite actually. But you are right. Were not in the same league. Its me that is not.....not....not....worthy of you. I just don't want you to drag yourself down with me."

His head went back down to his lap. I am just staring at him stunned. I thought it was me. I thought it was a bad experience for him or something. I thought I did something wrong. But he thinks its him. He thinks he's not "worthy" or something. How can he think that? Why does he think that? Who am I to even be worthy off?

I snapped myself out of my head and decided to ask him the questions I am thinking. Im ripping off the band aid even though this will be embarrassing and awkward.