Forgive Me

Break-up Chapter 1

I sat against the brick wall of the school, my one tiny braid in my dark brown hair hung low and my grey eyes counted pebbles on the ground. Music playing in my ears to drown out the obnoxiousness of teenagers. As the music played, I identified the colors of the pebbles I counted.

1-green. 2-red. 3-grey. 4-brown. 5-tan. 6-mixed.

The lyrics seemed to echo my thoughts. It had only been a week since my break up with football player, Aaron. I thought he was passionate, caring, just . . . different.

I took a chance to have my first real relationship, a real friend who understood me. He wasn't perfect, but I didn't want him to be.

I chuckled at myself. I had let my guard down. I never let it down, not even with my own parents.

I had no real friends, and I liked it that way. No friends meant no heartbreak. I've seen the damage relationships could do to people, they broke you when you thought it was going well. I decided after much thought and self-examination that maybe, one would be okay.

Nope. After a year of dating, rumors spread that Aaron was cheating.

Oh look! Isla and Aaron are kissing. Do you think she knows he cheated?

I didn't really hear them though as I was often either alone playing music, or with Aaron. I was so happy with him. I felt as if I was flying and gravity could never pull me down. That is, until I was slammed back to the ground in merciless despair.

A week ago

I grabbed the free lunch from the cafeteria and scoffed at its contents. The gross cheap bread with a tasteless patty and dried fruit. I can’t complain though, it's free.

As students started flooding the cafeteria, I spotted him. Aaron, the football player. His tall and lean body stood out, and his freckled tan face looked around. I smiled as I thought he was looking for me. Our eyes met, his crystal blue eyes with a green steak in one. His dark brown hair was ruffled and his smile crooked as we walked toward each other. When we met, he kissed me on the cheek.

"They're whispering again." I said.

"Let them." He answered. We sat down. Some of the football team tried to sit with us but we shooed them away. Girls who I've never met before tried to make conversation, but I told them a hot guy was walking in a different direction and they flew like a flock of birds. We laughed at the recent encounter. Leave it up to Aaron's popularity to disturb our "lunch date", if you could even call it that. I spread some papers and homework on the table as I cracked down on my work.

"Hey, I gotta go ask about some math homework. I'll be back." He said, standing up.

"You good?" I asked.

"Of course! Wait for me." He said, grabbing his backpack and running down a hallway. I watched as he left. The hallway he went down had my locker in it. That reminds me! I need to pick up a textbook for next period.

I left my stuff, threw my nasty free food away, and went to my locker. After putting in the combo and hearing a click, I ripped it open and grabbed my textbook. Suddenly a voice was speaking from a nearby classroom. I smiled. I could recognize that voice anywhere. Aaron.

Should I go say hi? Wait, he could be talking to a teacher, I shouldn't interrupt. But who knows, maybe I could help. Nah, you don't want to seem clingy. Well, maybe I could just peek my head in.

I walked over and inched my head just around the doorway. My eyes practically bugged out of my head. Aaron was kissing a perfect babe of a cheerleader. I only saw it for a split second, but a split second was enough. I ran back to the cafeteria table. Never prefer have I felt the need to cry, until then. How could I have been so stupid?

I angrily shoved papers into my backpack. Seconds later, Aaron came and said he needed to tell me something, worry etched in his expression.

"I already know." I replied, not even looking at him.

"What?" He looked surprised at this. I grabbed the last of my things and shoved them carelessly into my backpack. Did he really expect me to believe his reaction? Did he think I was that stupid? A part of my brain wanted to hear him out, but I murdered it and slowly let all emotion exit my body. Anger, love, happiness, sadness, nothing was left. I was once again empty.

"Quit the act. We're done." I left the cafeteria and didn't look back. At least not physically.

Present

The memory burns my vision. His surprised blue eyes with one green vein showed all. I decided to end it before he did. Even now, his very freckly face, dark brown hair, and cheesy smile still creep into my thoughts. I'm so stupid to still have fluttery thoughts about him now. I have this new goal though, my borders will go back up, and stay there— permanently.