Numb [Dan Howell FanFic]

Heart Beats

The kiss intensified and he pushed me against the counter and we did not separate. He walked me over towards the sofa. His hands on my waist, giving me chills. I turned him around and threw him on the sofa, he was laying down. And I sat on him still kissing him. He slipped off his shirt. He started to take mine off but I gasped and grabbed his hands.

"I'm sorry." He said.
" No, I am."
" Please don't be."
" I-I'm so sorry."

He sat up and kissed me.

" I need to know, James."
" What must you know?"
" Why do you kiss me, when you don't like me?"
He sighed.
"I'm done." I got up from the couch.
"Lil-"
" Where's the nearest park?"
" Why?-"
"Where?"
" Down the street to the left."
" Thank you."
I walked out and down the stairs.

It was very warm outside and my cheeks were very red. Once I walked a few block I saw slides and what I wanted, swings. I slowly walked to swings and sat down and gently swung back and forth. I cried. There was no one at the park except for a couple. And a mum and daughter. I picked at my nails and dragged my feet on the pavement. For a moment I looked up from my hands and it was all black. Suddenly I saw my mom handing things to my dad and him giving me a creepy smirk. Then I heard my mom laughing, and then my screams.

" Lilith, are you okay?"
" No, I am not."
" I am so sorry."
" Don't be. I asked."
" Lilith."
" Yes?"
" I am in love with you."
" Please don't lie for me."
" I am not lying."
" Dan, I am in love with you. I had a crush on you since forever ago but I love you. That's different, and I cannot make it stop. You kiss me only for pity."
" You are so wrong, I love you. You are the girl."

And I focused. My eyes opened and I stopped swinging and looked for Dan. But he was not here, my imagination just made me go through hell. And I kept thinking 'why Dan?' Why did I let him screw my emotions up even more without him doing anything. We've kissed twice and he does not even like me.

The world was spinning and so were my thoughts. Instead of saying I wanted Dan to kiss me when he asked me what I wanted I should of said him. Because all I want is Dan. I got up and started to walk to the apartment when out of nowhere I bumped in to a man in a suit.

"Lilith, you should really watch where you are heading.."
" I, um did not. I did see you not where I was gonna go."
" Ahh, don't worry. I am not going to hurt you."
" You are."
" I only want to show you something, sweetie."
" No you do not."
" It's important."
" No I-"
" You were gone from home a very long time, you left poor Dan on his own."
" What did you-"

I felt a sharp pain in my neck and everything went blurry. A few minutes later I woke up in a black car.

" Where are we?" I said once we were getting out the car.
" Shut up."

I did, and I let my dad shove me in to a hallway in the building. He kept pushing me in to different halls, until we got to a room. The room was all white, and there was no one there. He hit me so hard I jumped in to the room. I could almost feel my skin turning purple from the shove. The room itself gave me small chills, my father made me want to cry in agony. I looked back at him, and saw my mother had arrived.

" What is this?"
" Oh darling, It is entertainment."
" What the hell do you want, huh?"
" Only you."
" I am not your punching bag anymore, I am eighteen. I am no longer your concern."
" Oh but you are, we worry about you, Lilith."
" Sure you do."
" We care about you so much we brought a gift."
" What?"

Two men brought in someone tall and lean with a sack over his head. It couldn't be. But it was.

" Dan was so lonely."
" Please, let him go."
" I will do what I please Lilith."