The Crushed Spider

Chapter fOuR

Holy shit here we go

     As the third movie started, (we've now moved onto Barbie and the dream house) Peter stayed close to the edge of the couch. He was huddled up, with a blanket wrapped around his small frame. Tony sat next to Steve, with his legs draped over the Captain's lap as he argued with Clint if Ken is Barbie's brother  or boyfriend. Natasha was cuddled next to Clint on a loveseat that was closer to the wide TV screen and booming surround sound.  Bruce sat alone on the floor, mountains of pillows around him as he constantly rearranged them. Bucky was... somewhere in those mountains of pillows. Somewhere.....

     These were the moments Peter loved. The moments where he felt like he belonged. But deep down, he knew he didn't. He knew he never would. And that's what kept him awake. This wasn't his family. He didn't deserve one. They didn't need him. So through all the movies, even when everyone was asleep, Peter stayed wide awake. The credits were rolling on "Men in black II" by the time he got up. The rest of the team was sound asleep. It was around 4 am. The sunrise would be soon.

     Peter gathered his things, turning around one last time to look at the team. A ghost of a smile crossed his lips as he gazed at the heroes. Walking up the stairs, Peter counted each step until he made it to his room. The door was still open. He walked in, his breath picking up at the memory of earlier. His face flushed, embarrassed that the team had to see him like that.

     The young teen walked over to his bedside, looking out a window that had been cut out so he could swing in and out. The ledge was big enough for him to sit on, he had that specifically made so he could watch the sun. Opening the window, Peter gazed out and sighed, breathing in the fresh air. The sun had just started to show.

     It was beautiful. The ball of fire was a soft gold, as it came over the trees and stretched up. The sky was filled with streaks of dark purple and pink. The trees seemed to flourish in the light. The city of New York would just be waking up around now. The people setting up shop, yawning and making coffee. Shop owners sweeping the sidewalks, cars slowly coming by. Teenagers waking up, getting ready for high school. Like normal kids, getting on the bus, sitting next to their best friend. Their mothers kiss them goodbye, their fathers wave and remind them to pay attention.

     Maybe that's what Peter missed. The morning. But he had no reason to pity himself. After all, he had the life every teenager dreams of, right? Maybe it's just him. It is him. That's what Peter has convinced himself. It's all his fault.

     As the birds begin to chirp and wake, Peter closes the window. He would have to patrol later. Yawning, he made his way to the large bed in the corner. Even after he repeatedly told Mr.Stark that he didn't need it, the bed was there anyway. Right across from his private bathroom. So yeah, Peter has it all. All except a meaning. He often would question that. Why was he here? What made him so special other than the powers? What would he be without them? Nothing.

     Settling in, Peter sighed. Tomorrow would be another day of sitting in front of a laptop, finishing out school. He was a couple years ahead of most. But that doesn't matter. It doesn't make him specially. Finally, Peter fell into a dreamless sleep. Dreamless yes, but thoughtless? No. He's still haunted by those nightmares. Those memories of each time he messed up. Each. And. Every. Time.

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640 words

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