Backseat Serenade (Alex Gaskarth~Completed)

|33|Bitter Nightmare|

| Ember |

Song: Me without you (All I Ever Wanted) - All Time Low

*A Few Days Later*

I've only been here about a week, and I'm going back already. I quickly throw some clothes into a duffle bag, including my funeral clothes.

I put on some blue skinny jeans, a white long sleeved shirt and I slide on my ankle boots. This is probably the most effort I've made in days. I'm proud of it. I brush my hair and leave it down. I'm only making an effort because I'll be in public, I'm not doing makeup though. I pack my book, headphones and charger into the duffle bag, along with some pyjamas and my speech.

"Ready sis?"

"Yeah." I yawn. "Why did we have a late night flight?"

"It would've been easier." I guess I'm less zombie like lately, I'm talking more. I still go silent every now and then, Wynter is still on my mind. Wynter will always be on my mind. I put on a hoodie and sling the bag on my shoulder. I follow Jack downstairs.

"Guys, your cab is here!" Alex shouts.

"We're coming!" Me and Jack shout at the same time. "Bye, Alex." I hug him.

"Bye Ember. I'll see you on Tuesday? I'll pick you both up."

"Sounds good, bye Alex." Jack says for me. They hug.

"Jalex is still real." I murmur. Jack laughs a little and hustles me out of the door. "I know. I'm coming." I get in the cab and lean my head on Jack.

"Tired?"

"Yeah." Stupid question. Of course I'm tired. I've hardly slept these past few days.

"You can sleep on the plane. I got first class, it's comfier."

*

We queue for the plane in silence, the first class line is really short. I take a sip from the bottle of water in my hand and then put it in my bag. I dig for my passport and ticket, then hand them to the smiling red haired man in front of me.

"Enjoy your flight Miss Mason." Yes, my name is still legally Mason and Jack had to put that.

"It's Barakat actually. I didn't change the name on my passport."

"Oh, so sorry Miss Barakat." He smiles. He looks around Jack's age, totally out of my league but still cute in his own way. He has short red hair, when I say red, I don't mean died like mine, and blue eyes, he's tall and skinny, with a nice and friendly smile.

Jack waits for me behind the man and we walk to the plane together. We have to go to the back, where the first class is. I wouldn't be surprised if they kicked us out of it, but Jack would do a hell of a lot of complaining if they did. I take my seat in the inviting looking chair and relax. It's so comfy compared to the normal class, there's loads of legroom and the chair can recline a little bit for comfort. I put my bag under the seat in front of me and fasten my seatbelt.

The plane doors close and it starts to slowly move onto the runway. To distract myself, I get the speech out and check it. If I can say it now without crying, I can do it later, right?

To comfort me, Jack holds my hand. He knows I hate flying. And it's not a love way of holding hands, it's a brother and sister way, our fingers aren't looped.

"Miss Barakat." The man nods. "Or is it Mrs?"

"No. This is my brother. He knows I hate flying so he's comforting me."

"Oh. Have a good flight." I'm not gonna have a good flight if I just said I didn't like it. Dumb ass.

My sadness has just been replaced with a lot of anger lately, I don't usually show it. It's just pent up inside of me, a swirling ball of red energy. Sometimes I feel like I'm gonna explode any minute.

*

It's half one in the morning. Too early to sleep for me usually, but I slept pretty much the whole flight. So it's too early for me to be up.

Me: sorry if I woke you Helen, we have landed. I'll see you tomorrow at 11am

Helen: it's fine. I was awake...thinking.

I decide not to dwell on that. I'm too tired. I rub my eyes and pull on my sleeves as I get off the plane. The night air hits me suddenly. I love it though. I love the cold. You can wear big coats, sleep in even later because of how cold it is. I invite winter.

Wynter.

His name hits me, just like the cold air did and I feel tears nearly still from my eyes. I stop them, but then the anger gets worse. I wanna punch someone or something. Me. I'll punch me. It's my fault. I could've stopped him.

I pick the strap up on my duffle bag, it was starting to slip.

"Stop blaming yourself." Jack tells me as we walk over to the hotel.

"I could've stopped him. That's all."

"You were across the country."

"I shouldn't have been."

"Ember. Stop. You're angry and upset. Don't take it out on me!"

"Whatever Jack! You don't know! I could've stopped Wynter if I hadn't have been in Baltimore!" I shout. I see the breath come out of my mouth in elegant white smoke.

"Being in Baltimore was the best for you. It's how I can protect you. Calm down please. I don't want you to be mad at me. I'm only trying to help." I sigh, meaning I give in. I did release a bit of anger out on him, but not that much.

We get inside the modern looking hotel and I like it. The floors look like a black marble with sparkles that shine in the fluorescent light.

"Two single rooms for Barakat." Jack smiles to the middle aged woman behind the desk.

"Of course." She gets two key cards. "First floor, rooms 9 and 10." She smiles and I see a few wrinkles around her eyes and mouth. We split off into our rooms and I put on the pyjamas that I packed, just some plain grey ones.

I climb into the plush looking bed. It's a weird size. Not exactly single, but not exactly a double. Deluxe single. That's what I'll call it.

The pillows are soft and the blanket is nice and soft.

Wynter. Wynter. Wynter. Why did you do this to yourself? You might be happier, but I sure am not! Why did you have to be so selfish and leave me?!

*Nightmare*

Wynter stands in front of me, his face pale and emotionless.

"How dare you!" I shout. "You had no right to kill yourself! People loved you!"

"I wanted my sister." He says blankly.

"You might be happier, but I'm not! You're mom isn't! You were selfish!"

"My sister. I'm with her. I'm happy."

"I'm not happy! I could've stopped you!"

"You promised you'd be there, you couldn't do that from the other side of the country."

"You broke your promise too! I called you all the time! Whenever you called, I answered! I was there. Unlike you, you didn't stay away from the blades."

I look at him. He's only in shorts and a shirt, the most skin I've ever seen him expose. Something catches my eye on his thighs.

"Wynter what's that?" I ask.

"I did it. It's my art."

"What?" He drifts closer to me and I see it. On his left leg, in sharp letters,

'SIS'

On his right leg in even sharper and rougher letters, something that stands out.

'EMBER'

"You could've stopped me." He says.

There's black.

*End of Nightmare*