#41

431 20 14
                                    

- I can't believe you made me wear it. I almost died from a heat stroke.
I said, and laughed.
Mingi just giggled, with his eyes closed.
- do you want to sleep?
I asked him.
- no I'm resting my eyes.
He said.
- can I look through your phone?
I asked him.
- sure.
He said.
- wait, why?
He asked.
- I want to look at your pictures.
I said.
- ok, but if you see some weird photos of Jongho you can't tell him about it.
Mingi said, making me laugh.

There was actually a lot of pictures of Jongho, especially when he was sleeping. And there was a few pictures of Mingi and Yunho cuddling.
That's so adorable.
There was also a lot of selfies of Mingi. I sent a few of them to myself, then I put down his phone. I really needed a glass of water.
- uhm, do you know were my underwear is?
I asked Mingi, making him laugh, and open his eyes.
- here.
He said, and pulled them out from under the covers. He was holding them up, and it made me a little embarrassed.
- thanks.
I said, and grabbed them.
- you're welcome.
He said, and smirked.
- don't look so proud.
I told him.

I got dressed, and went to my closet to find something else to wear. I was on my way out of my room to go to the kitchen, when Mingi suddenly appeared behind me, and put his arms around me.
- where are you going?
He asked me.
- I'm just thirsty.
I answered.
- I'm thirsty too.
He said, and giggled.
- you're welcome to join me.
I said, and laughed.

We went down to the kitchen, and got some water.
- Hey, I want to ask you something.
Mingi said.
- ok.
I said, and smiled.
- do you think... you'll love me forever?
He asked, making me blush.
- I'll always love you.
I said, and kissed him.
- does that mean.. you'll marry me?
He asked, making me almost choke on the water.
- do you want me to?
I asked him.
- I really do.
He answered.
I had never been this happy. Was this even real?
- but you'll have to wait.
He said, and sighed.
- I know..
I said, and kissed him.
I already knew that I would have to wait for us to be together in front of the whole world. But I was ok with that. I would wait until I was 50, if I had to.
- I have to go soon.
Mingi said. It was probably pretty late.
- that's ok.
I said, and hugged him.
- I love you.
Mingi said.
- yeah, you keep saying that.
I said, and laughed.
- don't be mean.
He said, and frowned.
- I love you too.
I said, and kissed him.

When I woke up the next morning, I decided to text Seonghwa. I really needed to know that he wanted to still be my friend. I know he said so yesterday, but it didn't seem like he meant it.

Sungyeon: I hope everything is okay between us.
Seonghwa: don't talk to me. I'm busy.
Sungyeon: don't be like this.
Sungyeon: hello?

I guess he wasn't planning on answering me again. Why is this happening to me? And what was going to happen if seonghwa was upset with me? Would he tell everyone the truth? Out of spite? No, he wouldn't do that. Not if he actually liked me. Maybe I should tell Mingi that he kissed me. If I kept it a secret for too long, it would be so much worse when he eventually found out about it.

I got out of bed, and got dressed. I didn't really have any plans, so I decided to just go visit Ateez again at practice. I knew I had to call my fathers work assistant, but I decided to do it later. I went to the KQ building, and walked to the dance practice room. I didn't bother nocking, so I just went inside.
- oh, you're back.
Wooyoung said.
- hey.
I said, and waved at everyone.
- are you here to watch us do something you can't do?
Wooyoung asked me, and smirked.

- Is she going to be here every day?
Seonghwa asked, and looked at me.
But he didn't look mad, he just looked, sad. It made me feel bad for a while, but then Mingi smiled at me, making it all better.
- if she wants to.
Hongjoong said.
- it's just that she..
Seonghwa started saying, but I interrupted him. Because I felt like he was about to tell them everything. He can't. If they have to know, i should be the one to tell them.

- I need to say something. I'm the one that...
I started saying, but then seonghwa grabbed my hand, and pulled me outside.
- what are you doing?
He asked me.
- I can ask you the same.
I said.
- i was just going to say that you'll distract us from practicing.
He said.
- oh god... I thought you were going to tell them... you know.. the whole notebook thing.
I said.
- I'll never do that, ok?
He said.
- you just seem upset with me.
I said.
- do you really think I would ruin everything for you just because I'm mad that I can't be with you?
He asked.
- I... I'm sorry.
I said.
- I'll never do that to you.
He said.
- why do you even want to be with me?
I asked him.
- don't you get it?
He asked me.
- get what?
I asked.
- I.. I love you.
He said.
Was he being serious? How could he love me, when he knew everything that I had done? He knew the bad side of me... and he still loved me?

- What the hell? You.. love her?

Mingi was suddenly standing in the doorway.
I couldn't really tell if he was mad at me... or if he was just mad at seonghwa.
All I knew.. was that I was about to pass out. And if I couldn't , I would totally fake it. It wasn't like I hadn't done that before.

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