It's not Betrayal

6- Awkward Conversations

"Why did you never tell me?"

Merlin stood awkwardly in Arthur's chambers. They had just arrived back in Camelot not long ago, and were just settling in. They both fiddled nervously, not meeting each other's eyes.

"You would've had my head." Merlin managed a weak smile despite the heavy seriousness of the situation.

"Do you really think that?"

Merlin looked away. "Honestly, I don't know. I didn't want to risk it, or put you in that position."

"I'm not sure what I would've done either." Mumbling and barely audible, Arthur couldn't even look at Merlin. How could he, after all he'd done? Merlin had lied to him, committed treason, and betrayed the laws of Camelot. Uncomfortable silence descended upon them, expanding amongst the room and adding to the already present tension. *intensity intensifies*

"It's not like I'm any different, I'm still the same person." Merlin added quietly.

"Maybe, but I just can't believe that you've been lying to me. That you would betray me, even after all these years, after all this time." Arthur wasn't yelling, or angry even, but Merlin wished he was. Anything would've been better than the apparent pain and betrayal in his voice. Still, he couldn't ignore the fact that Arthur was acting like Merlin had stabbed him in the back.

"Betrayed you? When have I ever betrayed you? Was it when I was saving your arse, constantly, without any credit? Was it when I had to keep who I am a secret because I would be killed otherwise? Was it when I was doing all your chores, and putting up with your insults, and putting my life on line every other day to save your life? You have no idea how hard it's been for me, I lost my best friend, my father, and the love of my life who you killed, and you didn't even know anything about it! I have defeated Nimueh, Morgause and any other evil sorcerer that decides that the only thing they want is Camelot's destruction! I have been stung, bashed, stabbed, thrown against walls, cursed, kidnapped and brain washed for you, Arthur, so don't you dare say that I am a traitor, because I am not."

Merlin stood tensely in front of Arthur, fists clenched and breathing hard. He had to admit, he felt a lot better after yelling, he couldn't count how many times he'd wanted to say that to Arthur. It felt good. Even his breaths felt lighter, the pressure of anxiety that he had been unconsciously carrying for all the years he had lived in Camelot, now released. Almost. It wasn't like Arthur wasn't going to let him live yet, sorcery was still treason in accordance to Camelot's laws.

Meanwhile, Arthur was shocked. All that had happened to Merlin? What sort of friend was Arthur if he didn't even know that Merlin had lost his best friend, father and first love, one of them at his own hand, for God's sake.

"Merlin... I'm-"

"No, don't start. I don't want your pity, I'd rather be executed." Merlin looked at Arthur, trying to read his expression. He was shocked, for one, that was for sure. Looking further, Merlin did see true sorrow and pity in the King's blue eyes.

"No, really Merlin, I'm sorry you went through all that. More importantly, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when I should've been."

Now Merlin was the shocked one. Arthur accepting him, that was one thing, but Arthur apologising? That was another. Never had the King of Camelot, the most arrogant and egotistical person Merlin knew, apologised to him.

"Sire, are you alright?" Merlin joked, grinning and failing to hold back a muffled chuckle. Arthur must've been hit on the head, that was the only explanation to his strange and caring behaviour.

"No Merlin, I'm serious. I've had a lot of time to think about... y'know. You, having magic, and I just think you're too much of a lazy dollop head to be evil." Arthur laughed while Merlin stared at him, jaw dropped and gasping while he dramatically clutched his chest in mock offence.

It wasn't like Merlin was that powerful, right? Arthur has seen Merlin make a complete fool out of himself plenty a time, there was not way Merlin could actually be a danger to Camelot, like Morgana.

"Me? A lazy dollop head? I think you've got it the wrong way around, you can't even put on a shirt without my help, clotpole."

Arthur laughed. "That was one time, I am very capable and independent." He was kidding himself, just quietly.

"If you say so."  Shrugging, Merlin raised eyebrows at the King doubtfully. Merlin found this too good to be true, he could hardly believe it.

"I think it was unfair of me to banish you." Arthur whispered in a unusually small voice. "I'm sorry for thinking that you would betray me, I know you would never do that. You're the best friend I've ever had, and I couldn't bear to lose you."

Beaming like the sun's rays, Merlin grinned wildly, but did nothing but nod happily. Everything was good; Arthur knew about Merlin's magic and he was still in possession of his head. He couldn't of been happier. All was well.

~

Hello readers, how are you on this wonderful day? I seemed to go through some writers block on this chapter, it was so hard to write to the point where it took me 3 days to write a sentence. It was really hard to think about what Arthur's reaction would be, and I'm still not entirely happy with it, but it's sufficient, I guess.

Arghhh

I hope this is good enough for you guys! Important question, what do you think I should do now? Come up with my own plot line, (probably Morgana involved) or keep trying to follow the line of the show? Please comment your answers *please I'm desperate*

Also, to whoever noticed my Harry Potter reference,  you're an amazing person. Reading back on this chapter, it's pretty bad and I'll probably change it completely at some point, but now I'm just glad that it's finished. And... title suggestions?? Please?

Have a good day/night

-Peter xx