Where love leads us (Sequel of BWYDT)

Chapter 16

Lauren was sitting on the floor in her office with her back against the wall, legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles, but her eyes were closed. She was awake, but barely. The morning at the office had been a little chaotic and she was still trying to get back into the swing of everything. She had struggled for so long balancing her creative life and home life and then was whisked away to London only to fly right back home into personal chaos. Some days she wished life had a pause button or at least days where things were just easy. But those days were gone, especially now with kids involved. The thought brought her back to the present and she opened her eyes and looked to Michelle.

"So, what draws you to photography?"

The teenager was sitting in her office chair, feet kicked up on the desk, her drink from lunch still in her hand. She pondered the question for a moment and looked around. "It's hard to explain. It's... lots of little things that just sort of combine to make a mound of reasoning that, at least at this point, I can't ignore or argue against."

Lauren bit her bottom lip at the lengthy, rambling, and very Camila like explanation. "Try anyway." She encouraged. "Photography is an art. Art is an expression. So... express yourself."

"You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"Absolutely not." The answer was quick and with a beaming smile. "You want to learn from me, but I can't just share my secrets and have them click with you and then boom you have a successful career. Connections and lessons don't work like that. You need to understand yourself, your emotions, your desires, and your fears. Then you can apply my lessons that fit if any actually do."

Michelle worried her bottom lip and leaned over to set her drink on the desk, making sure not to set it on anything that looked important. "It's going to sound stupid."

"I doubt that, try me."

"But..."Michelle tried arguing. Lauren could see that awkward struggle she had to express herself when she was younger all over her daughters face. "How do I know it's going to make sense to you? I can ramble on and on and you'll just be sitting there staring at me like I'm an idiot."

The older woman huffed a laugh and absentmindedly plucked a few pieces of fuzz from her black dress pants. "I have met a few idiots in my life and you are not one of them. Expressing yourself is scary. You're putting a piece of yourself out there that has never been seen before and you're not only asking people to accept it but to also understand it. Not everyone will." Lauren admitted fully, knowing from her own personal experience. "But once you learn more about yourself and are comfortable and confident in who you are, then it won't matter. Because then you will realize that expression isn't to please others. It's something you do for you, and sometimes, if we are lucky, other people accept it and understand it like we hope they do."

The teenager thought about it for a moment longer. She enjoyed talking with Lauren when it was just the two of them. It was comfortable and calm. There was no push or pull or awkwardness that most people would expect. "I'm an only child," she began cautiously. "I never really had anyone around to talk to a lot of the time. Eventually, there were friends in high school, but, you know, it's high school. Most kids can't look beyond their own day to day dramas."

Lauren bowed her head in acceptance of that fact. It was the same when she was younger and probably when her mother was that age too. "What about with Ariana?"

Michelle slouched a little so she was now lounged and looking up at the ceiling. "It's like I said last night. Mom has always been supportive, but there are certain things where... the enthusiasm only goes so far sometimes. And I don't blame her!" She assured the other woman quickly, meeting her eyes as a show of certainty. "I mean, there's only so much excitement I can have after the 20th viewing of Funny Girl. Yes, it's amazing. Yes, the music is great. Yes, the cast is incredibly talented. But come on!"