Adore You ✔️ || Clinton Cave

Chapter 30

Summary of Chapter 29 (SPOILER WARNING!!)

Since Clinton fears Franzi is being torn between life and death, he hurries up and brings Franzi back to Bri's house.
In the hospital however, Mitchel decides to stay there by himself with Christian together.
On the next day, Clinton and Ellie go visit Franzi. There they find out why Franzi wasn't feeling good lately: she is pregnant!
This makes Ellie happy yet she feels empty inside during the whole car ride due to the mishap she'd been in, and is still struggling with the consequences of it.
Out of nothing, Clinton suddenly suggests Ellie to have their own baby.
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Ellie's POV

"Wait what did you s- baby are you kidding?!"
"No I'm not"

Clinton stops the car and stares into my eyes.
I can't realize what he just said.
Make a baby?!
How did he suddenly decide to make this up? What is he even imagining in his beautiful head?

"Look, I don't want us to rush like that"
"Me too, but I don't think we're too fast. It's going to be fine I promise"
"Yeah alright- but I think I am- do you remember when I lied in the hospital, I was placed in a coma, and.. I lost our beautiful child meanwhile.." I faintly say as my voice slowly dies away.

"I know- but I won't let this happen once again, trust me.."
"How could you even forget this?" I look at Clinton with watery eyes.
"What do you mean- I never forgot this-"
"Why do you wish to have a second kid out of the blue then- I'd give myself some time if I was you." I look outside, avoiding eye contact with him.
He turns my head to face his.
"Princess.." he kisses my lips "I never forgot this, alright.. and alright, if you want some more time then fine, I'll wait.. I'd do anything for you"

"Then bring me home and leave me alone please" I say with a cold voice as I wipe my tears away.

He could talk to me any second I think, but he doesn't open his mouth while driving me back home.
Neither do I, because I keep overthinking what he has said all of a sudden. Why would he even say something like this? Or is it just me overthinking shit at the moment? Do I overact a little bit, or too much?

Honestly I don't freaking know what it is, I exactly know one thing at this point: I do not want to have a child after all the shit that I'd been going through.. but how should I let Clinton know? Damn.. if he only knew how I feel about this situation.. I don't want to hurt his feelings too..
_______

After Clinton had brought me home, I slowly walk upstairs and knock on my door, waiting for my mom to open it.
"Hey sweetheart, how is Franzi?" she gives me a kiss on my cheek.
"Mom she is pregnant!" I hug her for a minute straight. I missed her long hugs, they are the best.

Not only do I hug her because I'm happy for Franzi, yeah, that too, but also because I need my mom right now. I feel so lost and she is the only one who could help me.
Yet I try to hide my emotions from her, otherwise she will find out I was pregnant and even lost my child a few months ago.
_______

"That's amazing! I'm so happy for her!"
My mom makes coffee while I'm sitting on the chair, thinking about Clinton's words.
As she finally turns around handing a cup of coffee, and I take a sip of it.

"Ellie are you fine?" my mom asks.
I somehow don't feel like talking so I ignore her question.
"Ellie?" my mom tries to wake me up from my abstraction. I still give no reactions at all.
"Sweetheart!"
"Hm" I finally react to my mom looking straight into her eyes.
"Is everything okay?" she pouts.
"Oh! Well, I don't know.. I'm just a little tired I guess.."

She puts her cup onto the table and looks into my eyes.
"I'm your mom, I always feel when something is wrong. So tell me"
"It's nothing mom really, I just need a couple hours of sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a tough day"
I strictly refuse to talk about my problems, because there is no way I'll be used to talk to anyone about them. I don't know why, it makes me uncomfortable when people suddenly talk about my negative sides or weaknesses.