Ramen / Jonghyun Shinee ff

Friends again.

It have been 2 weeks  that I've started working. Nothing much have happened. I've grown closer  to the Shinee members, I've started being friends with Super Junior and a few of Nct members  ( most the dreamies , they are all so cute , friendly and fun to hang with) and got back to hanging more with EXO  ( minus Xiumin )

And I've tried to ignore Xiumin as much as I can . I don't hate him , but I don't like him either. I don't know how to put this on words. I simply don't want to see his face. I want to forgive him and continue my life like that never happened, but that is not that easy as it seems.

Flashback.....( 5 years ago )....

I've been on the office since 8 am and now is 10pm, and now I'm going to go on a late night date with Xiumin oppa. I haven't seen him in person for almost  a week now and I miss him so much. He said we need to talk for something really important.

Honestly it scared me . What if we brake up ? What if he is sick and don't have much time to live? What if I'm the one sick and I don't have much time to live? I was at the doctor a week ago and he said I was fine. OK, girl , get a hold of your crazy thoughts, nothing will happen. Everything thing is going to be OK.  He is just going to tell me that he will have a next comeback soon, that will be all. Right?

This thoughts have been in my mind for the whole ride to the place. It's a rooftop. It's the only place we can be comfortable and not worry about the paparazzi catching us.

He always puts lights around , sets up a table with foods and drinks and he always have a bunch of flowers on his hand to give it to me. He is the sweets person you could find.

Me and him have been together since my last year of high school. Which it will be 6 years.  A lot isn't it?

I was in front of the building.  I tried to not think of the bad feeling I had inside me , so I put a smile on my face and got inside. After reaching the rooftop everything was like always. That almost relaxed me. Almost. I still have that feeling.

"Hey, babyJ ! You made it! How are you? You look tired. " He said in a loving way , but his face didn't match his voice. He looked upset, angry, afraid and so more but , I couldn't put my finger on it.  I decided to ignore it and put the blame on the fact that he is tired form all the practicing .

"I'm fine.  You don't look good yourself.  Where the practices that hard. " I smiled at him and give him a kiss. Again something felt off. "What is it?"
"Nothing just tired let's seat down.  The food will get cold, if we don't start." He said on a quiet voice.

We set down and start eating in salience. This made it even more odd. We never eat in salience. Our dinner where full of joy and a lot of talking , serious ones but even whatever got in our minds. Salience? Never. I couldn't  take this anymore so I decided to ask him .

"Oppa, is something wrong?  Did you fought with the EXO members? " I asked.  I was seriously starting to get worried .
"No , I didn't. " He answered.  I was waiting for him to continue but he just kept eating.  That was all?
" Then did the company scold you? Did you do something wrong?" I kept asking . I want to now what is wrong.  I'm his girlfriend.  I have the right to know what is wrong.
"No , none of them." He said.  That was all? Is he seriously going to continue to act like this? He is getting on my nerves.  I put my hand on a first to prevent myself from exploding at him.

"This is not ,that is not. What is it?" I tried to stay calm but you could clearly hear the annoyance on my voice. He didn't say a word. Is he kidding with me now?
Then he said those words I thought I was never going to hear come out of his mouth.

"Let's brake up."

At that moment I felt like the world was crashing down. My heart broke up into million tiny pieces. The time stopped.  I could hear his voice reaping those words over and over again. I don't want to believe it. He is joking. He said that he will love me for the rest of his and mine life. He said that I was the only one for him. Did he find someone else? Did the company said something about us? But they already know and he said that if they dare say something ,like braking up, he would leave the company and not me. What happened now that he is acting like this? Did I do something?  Why? Why?