Love Me, Marry Me, Stay With Me (Revised)

Chapter 18 - The Kindest Decision Blake Made.

“Ahh… Ano kasi, Blake. Hmmmm… kelan tayo lilipat sa new house?? Hehe.” I was hiding my hands under the table because it was already shaking. Yes, I was this afraid of Blake.

Eh kasi naman, he’s masungit. Sometimes he would pin me in the wall and kiss me, I don’t know if he’s manyak or something. Tapos nakita ko na din sya magalit one time. And that was when I accidentaly dropped one of his trophies while I was cleaning them. As in he banged the door super loud and he didn’t go home for 2 weeks and I was worried about him.

“Maybe next month. Ano nga yun, Rein? Just tell me. Halata naman na tensed ka.” He placed his right hand on top of my left hand and looked at me seriously.

“Ano kasi…” I looked away from him and hinanda yung self ko na mapagalitan niya. “I know it’s impossible with us, hiding our marriage. With my surname as Bustamante, we couldn’t deny the fact that I am controversial enough to be investigated by the press or something…”

 

“Just go straight to the point. I’m done eating and I want to rest. I’m tired.”

 

“I want to study again. Look, alam ko impossible talaga but I can just go to a small school. And short course lang naman eh. Maybe a few months. I could also tell them that I paid to change my surname. Please, Blake? I just really wa—“ I was talking too fast para pag hindi niya ako pinayagan, I could just go to the room and have some rest na.

He stood up and went to the kitchen. I followed him and saw him opening a bottle of wine and prepare two glasses. “Please, Blake? Ayaw mo nga na magwork ako eh. I promise to be a good wife and hindi naman ako mawawalan ng time for you eh. Please??”

 

He took a sip of his wine and handed me the other glass. Halos maubos ko na yung isang baso ng wine dahil sa sobrang kaba. “In what school are you planning to take it? And what course?” He asked in curiosity.

“Just a small school in Taguig… Only 6 months. I’m planning to take up a course something about arts.” I replied in the lowest voice I could possible make.

“Why don’t you take up Multimedia Arts in St. Benilde? Multimedia Arts focuses in all the things you want to do and Benilde is the best art school I could think of here in the Philippines.” Bigla akong napatulala sa sinabi niya. Is he allowing me?!

Besides, De La Salle-College of St. Benilde is a big school and I could be easily be identified there. Pumunta nga lang sa mall, hindi ko masyadong magawa alone kasi somebody would surely ask for a picture with them. “Are you… allowing me to study??”

 

“Yes, I am. Ayaw mo?”

 

“Thank you, Blake!!!” I don’t know what came into me but I hugged him as tight as I could and I kissed his cheek. “I am going to be a good wife from now on! I promise!!! Thank you!!!”

 

“Don’t be too happy. Just make sure you keep a low profile. And make sure that no one’s going to know about us. If you have to lie, lie big. Keep me out of this.” He said and he walked away na.

I felt sad nanaman because hindi man lang siya nagwelcome or something. I just wish he would be less… masungit. Or kahit sana we would be close kahit konti lang.

It’s really hard to think kung ano ba yung ayaw ng husband mo sayo. I know I’m not a good cook, or I don’t clean the house well enough. But I do all the efforts I could naman eh.

I didn’t know why, pero everytime Blake takes home a girl and something happens to them, parang I couldn’t breath that’s why I just force myself to sleep nalang. Or sometimes, I would go out of my room on purpose and kunyari I didn’t know what was happening kaya when I disturd them, aalis nalang yung girl.

I know I’m not pretty enough or fierce enough for him, but I just hope that even just a little bit inside him, he cares for me.

Kasi ako, Oo. I care for him and he wouldn’t even go out of my mind sometimes…

 

Blake’s P.O.V.

 

“Thank you, Blake!!! I am going to be a good wife from now on! I promise!!! Thank you!!!” Nabigla ako ng bigla niya akong halikan sa pisngi at ihug. We have never been so close before and this was the first one na siya yung mismong naghug.

 

“Don’t be too happy. Just make sure you keep a low profile. And make sure that no one’s going to know about us. If you have to lie, lie big. Keep me out of this.” Before I continued walking away, I looked back and saw Rein na malungkot. I just let out a heavy sigh.

She did’t need to promise na she’s going to be a good wife because she already is.  Everytime I kiss and hug her para akong nakukuryente kahit madikit lang ako sakanya konti.

I know what that means and that’s why I keep my space away from her. Every day that I see her, I know that I couldn’t afford to break her heart. I’m not dumb to not know what that feeling is. Pero ang alam ko lang, love never existed.

As much as possible, I didn’t want to be close to her as well, para kung malaman niya yung ginawa kong pagsisinungaling sakanya, it wouldn’t be hard for the both of us to continue our lives in separate ways.

I repect her, I adore her, and I know that it wouldn’t be hard to love her. But I chose not to because she was way too better than me. No one ever deserves a basterd like me. Especially Rein.

I tried to shake away my thoughts as I try to sleep in the couch. Nasanay na din ako matulog dito dahil for five months, this couch has been my bed. Hahaha.