The Unknown [Minho x Reader] + gifs ✓

18. Confusion

It was already midnight.

I was sitting under my usual tree at the edge of the Deadheads remembering back to what happened. I was exhausted, but I couldn't keep my eyes closed even though I tried. I was angry, I was pissed off, I wanted to punch things. I wanted to punch Ben. I was at the verge of crying, I just wanted to let all my frustration out, but it just didn't seem to want to come. I felt like tension was building up in my body. Tension that I didn't know how to get rid of.

I heard silent footsteps, but I didn't look at the arrival. I kept my eyes closed, but even then I could recognise his scent anywhere. He sat down next to me without saying a word. The silence didn't seem uncomfortable though. I heard him shuffle around to find a better position.

"I'm sorry." My eyes snapped open.

"For what?" I asked trying to look into his eyes, but his gaze was fixated on the sky.

"For letting you go with him." He sighed. "I was supposed to be going with you, but last minute I changed my mind." I was confused.

"You know what? I don't get you." I started. "You changed your mind you say. But this isn't the first time. You have been ignoring me, you have not been talking to me, you have been literally avoiding me and it confuses the hell out of me. What is going on?" I asked in frustration.

"I have been nagged by the guys for a while." He sighed. "They keep telling me that you like me and I clearly am aware of it as you said yourself, but they keep telling me that they know I like you too and I should finally accept it and I just got fed up and I thought that the best option would be to distance myself if I wanted the rumours to stop." He explained.

"So basically you are just a coward." I showed him a thumbs up and turned back to look at the sky.

"You could call it that." He agreed.

"You know I just don't get one thing. You don't like me and that's that but why do you even care about what others think? I thought the big Minho, the Runner, the Keeper of the Runners wouldn't care about such minor things." I said sarcastically and looked back at him.

"Because I don't know what I feel." He sighed and I frowned in confusion. "If I didn't like you, it would be easy. I'd just ignore them. But I don't actually know what I feel." His expression looked puzzled. I raised an eyebrow at his sudden burst of honesty.

"Well figure it out then." I shrugged my shoulders. I didn't have energy to deal with other people's feelings when even my own ones were scattered around.

"It's not that simple." He stated and finally looked at me. Even in his eyes I could see how lost he was. He was new to these feelings. He only had to deal with boys so far, but I wasn't experienced either. Or at least I didn't remember if I was.

I felt a sudden confidence boost ran through my body and I did something I never knew I would have the courage to do. I leaned towards Minho and kissed him. His lips were soft even though I thought they would be rough. I slowly started playing with his lips. It came naturally as if my lips knew what to do. But he didn't kiss back.

I wanted to pull away feeling embarrassed, but he didn't let me. He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me back. He started kissing me passionately playing with my bottom lip. He pushed his tongue out trying to gain entrance and I let him. I silently moaned in pleasure and placed my hand on his chest. His tongue was dancing with mine forcefully. I was taken back by the amount of pleasure he was giving me. I wanted to get lost in his arms, but he started slowing down and soon parted us.

I looked straight into his eyes and I could see the same feelings I felt. Passion, care and the will to get lost in the moment. But it mixed with confusion. He didn't know how he felt. I leaned back to the trunk of the tree and looked back at the sky. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know why I did it, let alone why he returned it.

"Let's forget about that." He said scratching the back of his neck. I saw every movement of his from my side vision. I scoffed. I felt broken. Let's ignore it, let's pretend it never happened, but forgetting about it was a strong word of use.

"Sure." I replied plainly. "Go ahead."

"What do you expect me to do then?" His frustration was very clear.

"I don't expect anything. I can very well pretend that nothing happened, but I can not forget. I'm sorry." I shrugged my shoulders and started getting up, when he grabbed my wrist.

"I don't understand you." He sighed looking straight into my eyes.

"You don't understand me? Me?" I raised my eyebrows in disbelief. "I don't understand you. I know what I feel and I know how to handle it. Yes, it was my mistake to kiss you, but so far I went along with everything you have done. You ignored me and I didn't say anything. You didn't talk to me and so I went to Ben or Newt when I needed something. You avoided me so I didn't go near you. What else do you want from me? If you didn't realise we haven't found a way out of this place yet therefore I'm sorry, but I can't just disappear. Or at least I'm not planning on getting myself stung so you can just get rid of me." I pulled my wrist out of his hands. "Sort yourself out." I said angrily and walked off.

I headed towards my room when Newt stopped me along the way.

"I didn't eavesdrop or peep, but what just happened..." I didn't let him finish it.

"Please just ignore it. I do not want to hear about it any more. It was a mistake from both of us and that's that." I said and left the dumbfounded boy behind. I didn't want to think about anything but my bed and sleeping.