Collide : A Robsten Fanfiction

Chapter 37 : Turmoil

"Hey John" He greeted him with a hand shake and both faced me afterwards.

"Have you met Robert?" He asked Nic.

"Yeah! I've met him already, couple of times" He smiled pleasantly and held out his right hand. "It's nice seeing you again Rob." He added, waiting for me to receive his handshake.

At first I just stared at his hand, for a moment I thought everyone on the table held their breaths.

"Nicholas. Of course." I finally stood up and shook his hand with a firm grip.

Was that a sigh of relief I heard from one of the guys? Seriously. The last thing I'm gonna do was throttle him in front of them, no matter how much my hands itch.

"Great great!" Our friend exclaimed. He patted Nic on the back, handed him a beer and told him to sit down with us.

He did, and we all proceeded to drink and banter stories raucously.

***

Lindsey and I were sitting at the porch, drinking and exchanging stories for a good full hour since I arrived.  Nic has gone to enjoy the night with his guy friends. I didn't mind. 

We already both finished three bottles of our drink when she had to excuse herself to go to the bathroom. I nodded and told her that I'll just wait here.  I really am having a good time talking to her.

So when the door opened again I smiled surprised. "That was fast!" I exclaimed before turning to her.

"What is?"

But it wasn't Lindsey. It was Rob.

My heart thumped in my chest and I was completely robbed of speech.  I know he was here, but I wasn't expecting to see him alone.

"Mind If I stay here for a moment?" He asked. "It's getting all kinds of crazy inside" He added as he took out his pack of Newports.

I shook my head, still frozen in my place. He smiled and slowly came forward right next to me. We were both leaning at the corner bannister.

He lit his cigarette and handed out the box, inviting me to take one. I stared at it processing every single gesture before remembering that I'm trying to cut back from smoking so I turned him down.

"So you're not smoking anymore?" He asked as he returned the box in his pocket.

I shook my head and just stood there right beside him like an idiot.  When I realized how foolish I might seem to him I turned back and leaned comfortably at the railing and took a much-needed swig from my drink.

"You're awfully quiet" He said and I nodded. "It's been quite a while since I last heard your voice."

I can't believe he's doing this. I was completely unable to process the emotions that was overtaking me.

I took a deep breath to bolster my courage.

"Why would you want to hear it anyway?" I said quietly.  It was an honest observation. Why would he want to anyway? Whatever for?

"I happen to miss it, like how I happen to miss my friend too." He answered.

We weren't even looking at each other.  We were just there, standing right next to each other with a noted space in between, throwing words in the air hoping the other person could catch its meaning.

"Oh..." That automatically came out of my mouth unconsciously. Trust Rob to render me speechless.

"I know it's uncomfortable for you with my being here - " He started to say.

"No no...It's not. Don't think of it that way." I mumbled incomprehensibly. He completely misunderstood the situation.  I was the one being awkward.

"I just want you to know that I'm not leaving LA anytime soon." He said directly.

"I understand. You don't really have to explain anything to me you know" I replied.

"I know. I was actually hoping that this time we could be...friends again...if not"

My head snapped up to look at his face.  It was only now that I looked at him directly.  Was he suggesting...but I must be mistaken.

"What are you saying?" I asked, not knowing if the answer I was actually expecting from him would make or break me.

He shrugged and smiled. "Is your boyfriend gonna be angry if he knows you're out here with me?"

I frowned at him. "He's not my boyfriend."

"But you're dating him." He raised his eyebrows at me.

"Probably...probably not. What is dating anyway? I'm not even sure." I fumbled. "Why are we talking about this? I'm pretty sure this is none of your business" I added annoyed.

He paused and stared at me with a sharp look in his eyes. I looked away uncomfortably.

"I'm making it my business again..."

My jaw dropped. I'm quite sure I misheard him, but when I looked back at him there was nothing but seriousness in his face.

***

"I'm not sure I understand." She replied dismissively.

"I'm saying I wished nothing has changed..." I said honestly.

I probably shocked her with my brash and direct attitude.

"I uh....I think Nic's probably looking for me already" she mumbled and turned away.

I laughed at her evasion. It went the way I expected it to work.

"I look forward to our next get together" I called out to her before she went fully inside. I smiled to myself. So he isn't a boyfriend, that's good, makes it easier for me.

***

I quickly went around looking for Lindsey as soon as I left the porch.  I saw her slumped in one of the sofa, she was drunk as predicted.  She was drunk and passed out and left me to be preyed by a wolf. I shook my head from the thoughts. Was that really Rob? For a moment I thought he was very suggestive of something, and now I realized he was probably joking again like he used to.  It's no surprise already how ridiculous some of his jokes were, but this one takes the cake.

I woke up Lindsey and dragged her to her boyfriend so he can bring her home, that's when I saw Nic.

He was completely oblivious of what just took place. Truthfully, I wasn't even sure it really took place.  I feel like I was in a dazed dream, still not comprehending what Rob meant to happen.

With my expression, Nic knew I wanted to go. So with a hasty excuse again we left and he drove me home.

I just gave him a chaste kiss on the doorstep and told him I have to sleep early to his disappointment.

I sighed, the last thing I wanted was to hurt Nick.  It all started as an innocent attraction and I didn't really plan to invest in us emotionally, but it looks like he beat me to it.

What a mess.