You Want It All Until You Have It

Laughing After Dying Is The New Trend

The drive back from getting his car was agonizing. I wanted him with me at all times. It seemed absurd to need to be around someone at all times until Dan showed up. 

"Shit," I said under my breath. It's funny how things just slip your mind. I patted around looking for my phone. It wasn't there.  I glanced over and saw it on the floor on the passenger side. I looked up at the road before diving over to retrieve my phone. Multiple people laid on their horns. The rational part of me said sit back up and fix whatever I did, but the human part of me panicked. The steering wheel turned even more and I froze. Don't people freeze when they think that they might die?

Somehow I pulled myself up and managed to find an exit and pull into a deserted parking lot. I slowed my breath back to an even pace and began to laugh. I laughed as if that were just some trick I pulled on myself.

I called Gabe, still laughing when he picked up. 

"So you just called to laugh?" He spat. He was obviously still upset. 

"No, no. I was just laughing because... Well, I mean, I almost killed myself trying to call you, but that's beside the point. I called to apologize."

"Hold up. You what?"

"I'm sorry about being an asshole."

"Okay, apology accepted, but how did you almost kill yourself?" He sounded pissed off about the situation. Poor Gabe. He should have chosen a better friend.

"Just, you know, swerving across a few lanes of traffic, trying to grab my phone."

"Are you okay?" 

"Yeah, I'm good. People avoid swerving cars pretty well," I said with a chuckle.

"Call me back when you aren't acting fucking insane." I sighed, and hung up. He was still really pissed.

I was startled out of my self pity by a stranger sitting down on the seat next to me. That stranger was Dan.

"Howdy," I joked.

"What the fuck was that?" 

"I had to make a call." He studied my face trying to decide if I was telling the truth. "I'm laughing but I'm actually terrified. I don't mean to laugh." He gave me a sympathetic look. 

"Let's just get back, okay?" He grabbed my hand and squeezed it before leaving. 

-

"Well, I'm not in a car, and I think I'm pretty sane." I sat on the couch in the basement.

"What exactly happened?" He was still pretty freaked out about it all. I missed him.

"I forgot I had never apologized to you, and I kind of panicked and searched for my phone. I went to pick it up off of the floor of the car, and I have no idea how it ended up there. Anyway, I guess the car drifted then cars honked, and my leg hit the steering wheel and it turned even more. I kind of froze as that happened, but I fixed everything." A nervous laugh escaped my lungs.

"You're going to get yourself killed if you keep this shit up," he sighed. 

"I just miss my favorite person," I confessed. Sure Dan was my current obsession, but Gabe was constant in my life. My life was like a river. People would always come, but they would slip away just as fast as they came. Gabe was like a rock in the middle of the river. He was always there and kept me steady. He was my rock. 

"Yeah, I almost missed you too," he joked. I laughed with him. 

"So how far are you with Dan?" He asked in a lower voice.

"Far away. Well I mean he's just upstairs but you get it." 

"Yeah, got it. What would you do without me?"

"I'd be a bitter hermit. Thanks, Gabe."

"Love you." I could almost hear him smile.

"I love you, too. Bye now."

"Bye, ry." He snickered as I hung up. Probably because he rhymed. I smiled, shook my head and started up the steps to find my giant.