My Physical Therapist

Chapter 10

"You have every right to be," Jesy said. "Do you want me to knock some sense into Perrie?"

"I don't think there's any need," Jade sighed. "She literally said this morning she still loves me and isn't going to leave me for Alex."

"But how is she going manage now having Alex in Lily's life?" Jesy asked. 

"I don't think she even knows," Jade replied. "After all, Alex just showed up yesterday. It's just as hard on her as it is on me. Probably harder."

"You don't deserve this," Leigh Anne frowned, resting her head on Jade's shoulder. "How are you doing?"

"Never better," Jade drawled, gesturing to the red ringing her eyes. 

"I shouldn't have asked," Leigh Anne said. 

"It's fine," Jade replied dismissively. "I'm hungry. Can I order?" 

"Sure," Jesy said, both her and Leigh Anne exchanging worried glances. "What do you want?"

"Wa - " Jade paused, realizing that she was about to order what Perrie always got. A waffle topped with whipped cream and strawberries, no blueberries. 

"French toast!" Jade finally said frustratedly. Jesy and Leigh Anne exchanged glances again before Leigh Anne jotted down Jade's order and walked back to the kitchen. Instead of following her, Jesy sat down in the booth next to Jade. 

"Look, I've been your best friend since we were seven, when you defended me from the bullies picking on my clothes," Jesy said, her voice gaining a softness it only had when she was either talking to Leigh Anne or sometimes Jade. "You were fearless, and I admired you for it. You gotta fight for what you want, and I am sure that the Jade Thirlwall that I know would always fight back."

"It just feels like I'm fighting a losing battle," Jade said quietly. "Like I'm swimming upstream, or fighting against a ripcurrent."

"Have you ever considered taking a step back?" Jesy asked cautiously. 

"Jesy!" Jade exclaimed. "Perrie needs support right now, Lily's dad just walked back into their lives after he left four years ago."

"You're like a candle Jade," Jesy said finally. 

"A what?" Jade said. 

"A candle," Jesy repeated. "You burn yourself out to give others light. You take care of others before yourself. But sometimes you need to put yourself first. You need to take care of yourself Jade."

Jade let out a long breath, leaning back in the booth. "I sold my apartment," she said finally. "If I left, where would I go?"

"You can live with me and Leigh," Jesy suggested. 

"Since when did you two have a house together?" Jade asked, wiggling her eyebrows at her best friend. 

"Not that long," Jesy said, her cheeks flushing with color. "Stop trying to change the subject."

"But I love her," Jade said sadly. "I don't know if I can take a step back."

"The only way to find out is to try," Jesy reminded her.

Jade nodded slowly, Leigh Anne coming over and placing the brunette's food in front of her. 

"Did you have a good talk?" Leigh Anne asked. 

"Yeah," Jade said, taking a bit of the French toast. "I think we did."

************

"Perrie?" Jade called out, shutting the door behind her. 

"Jade!" Perrie exclaimed, coming around the corner. "You're back!"

Jade forced a smile as Perrie came closer, the blonde stopping and her eyes narrowing as she examined the brunette's face. 

" ... You've been crying," Perrie said softly, reaching up to cup Jade's cheek with her hand. 

"Um, yeah," Jade replied, pushing past Perrie and swallowing the lump in her throat. "Can we talk?" 

"Sure," Perrie said, clearly caught off guard as she followed Jade into the living room. 

"What is going on?" Perrie asked after a minute, reaching over to take Jade's hand. 

"I thought I could do this but I can't." The words came rushing out of Jade's mouth so fast she didn't think Perrie had heard them. 

"Wait what?" Perrie asked. "Slow down love, I can't understand what you said."

Love. 

The simple word was enough to bring tears to Jade's eyes for what seemed like the millionth time this morning. 

"Jadey, talk to me," Perrie said, her voice tinged with panic as her hands brushed over Jade's shoulders, her arms, her cheeks, in an attempt to get the brunette to stop crying.

"I can't do this," Jade gasped out. 

"You ... what?" Perrie asked quietly. 

"I thought I could but I can't," Jade whispered, a tear falling and landing on the back of Perrie's hand. 

"Jade, are you saying what I think you're saying?" Perrie asked, Jade recognizing the shimmering of tears in the blonde's eyes. 

"He's upstairs right now, with Lily," Jade said, waving her hand in the direction of the stairs. "I feel like you're all in a happy little bubble, but I'm stuck on the outside. I don't know what to do anymore."

"That's not true," Perrie cried. "Please don't go Jadey. I need you, I love you!"

"I love you too Pez," Jade whispered. "And that's why I'm taking a step back. So you can focus on your family. On your daughter. Not on me. I need to take care of myself, and I can't do that here. It's just not working anymore Perrie. It's too much."

"He's only been here for a little over a day," Perrie shot back weakly, tears rolling down her cheeks. "Please don't go."

"I have to," Jade said softly, standing up and releasing Perrie's hands. Before she could make it out of the room, Perrie grabbed her wrist and spun Jade around, capturing the burnette's lips with hers. 

All of the emotions Jade was feeling spilled over into the kiss. Passion, longing, sadness, anger. She gripped the back of Perrie's shirt, locking herself in the blonde's arms as their lips moved together as they had many times before. 

When they pulled apart Perrie looked down at Jade hopefully with her beautiful blue eyes, already rimmed with red. 

"I'm sorry," Jade whispered, disentangling herself from Perrie's arms and taking a step back. It was almost comical how fast Perrie's face fell, her smile crumbling as she collapsed onto the couch. 

Unable to bear much more, Jade turned to leave the room, pausing one last time to look back at Perrie, sobs wracking her beautiful body. 

"I'm so sorry," Jade said, a lone tear trickling down her cheek as she opened the door and slipped out of it, walking away from the house without a backward glance. 

My poor Jerrie, Jade's finally broken :(

I was going to have this book be similar to Just a Bit, and I had said that I was going to be a short story and full of Jerrie fluff but now I think I'm going to lengthen the book and make it have more drama lol don't kill me please