Broken Strings

Scent

Swecha POV

I opened my eyes as the sunlight filtered through the corner of Pi window escaping through the curtain. I was momentarily blinded and blinked a few times to clear the sleep fog. Pi was sleeping. His face was inches from mine and his arm is around my waist. Our toes were almost touching. He looked this way and if I wanted to go to the extra mile, beautiful even. I guess he was always beautiful, if only he removed his horn rimmed disgusting glasses. He didn't even posses any sight problems as far as I know and the glasses are, according to him, keeps away the dust and sends the message that I am the topper. I shook my head. His eyelashes are longer than what was visible through his glasses.

Too long to be real. They must be fake.

I brushed my finger tips gently across his eyelashes quietly, not to wake him up. They were soft to my touch and felt too real. His lips parted a little as I withdrew my hand and the corner of his mouth twitched up just a tiny notch. If I wasn't an expert on his mood swings and expressions I would have never noticed it. He must be having a good dream. I was surprised that he let me stay and even more surprised at my decision to stay here the night. But if you are being chased by nightmares of your dead mother and hateful family, I guess it calls for extreme measures. I couldn't sleep alone and from the way Pi was acting the past three days after the stunt I pulled he would jump off a cliff if I asked him to and that thought made me grin. But I have to say, sleeping with Pi, even though to keep my nightmares at bay has advantages.

I laid back comfortably back down on the pillow and watched him. I have to say having a Pi who isnt glaring around or emotionless is great. Its fucking amazing. He is wasting his pretty face with his glasses and emotionless emotions. If you know what I mean.

I was still staring at him when he opened his eyes.

They were a mixture of dark brown with light brown flecks. A combination I never knew would be so fascinating. His gaze was intense and if I know enough, which I am sure I do, scared.

What? I whispered at him. Somehow the position we were currently and the way he was looking at me brought out my voice in a whisper.

Why did you do it? He asked.

It wasnt curiosity or pity like many others who asked me this question. It was sadness. Sadness that something hard enough happened to me that drove me enough try to end my life willingly. Sadness I never found in anyone in my family or anyone I knew. Tears unstoppable build up behind my eyes and I looked up concentrating hard not to spill them off. Never ever cry. That was a thing I always followed. I am not allowed to weakness to anyone. And I mean anyone. I was blinking rapidly and I probably looked a mess right now.

His touch was soft but assuring and his fingers slightly grazed along my cheek and turning my face slightly but enough to meet my eyes.

Just dont do it, again. I dont want to feel this, whatever this is, again. He whispered back and this time I didnt bother blinking them back as he pulled me towards his chest and enveloping me in his soothing scent.

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I didn't leave his apartment after that night or more specifically he forbid me from leaving his place. That strangely pleased me. A routine fell around us and we slowly settled into this comfortably. The mornings are filled with my whining about the unfairness getting up early for college and Jay making my choice of breakfast. He was an excellent cook. Come to think of it there isn't actually much that he cannot do. He cooks, cleans the house and more importantly holds you all night whenever you have nightmares and you can wake up to beautiful view and scent. If it wasn't for his 24/7 emotionless façade and full on blast walls around him he was a perfect boyfriend material. Only if you are okay with the whole fact that he would not even flinch if you throw a glass at his head during an argument nor he would cry if you leave him as he was incapable of feeling pain both emotionally and physically.

A week passed and my nightmares reduced gradually but I didn't let this little information reach Pi though.I liked the arrangement as it is now and if I was being honest with myself, I am not ready to spend my nights alone again.

One of those nights, the moments when you are awake and waiting for sleep to take you, when you are incredibly aware of each other presence and Jay takes of his glasses and hits me hard with his face and intense gaze, I mustered up the courage to ask him the question I was carrying with me for a long time.

"Pi?"

"Hmmm." He said his eyes not leaving my face.

If I thought Pi was staring before that was nothing compared to the way he was watching me right now. I guess finding your friend trying to kill her off changes the way you look at her.

"I overheard something from Maanav before. He said that whenever you are sad or upset you would go and sleep under the bed......Why?"

He didn't answer right away and he looked surprised like my question he never actually considered himself. He began speaking slowly but his voice was devoid of any emotion.

"I was around 7 when my parents were killed. I don't remember much about what happened that night except that they died and I was found barely alive after the fire department arrived. I remember bits of it though. Mom pushing me under my bed and covering me up with bags and blankets. I could hear her screams from the outside but I didn't make a sound afraid what will happen to me if I did. They didn't find me and I guess they burnt down the house to cover up the evidence of their murder."

He said. Though his voice was a monotone, his eyes were sad. I entwined my fingers around his and gave a little squeeze. He glared at me and I grinned.

"I thought your parents died in a fire accident. That is what Maanav said."

He sighed.

"There was no evidence of murder and the entire house was burned down without a trace of the crime. No one would believe a seven year old who just came out a burnt house with a traumatic experience and ruled out my statements as a result of shock of what I have been through. I never tried finding the truth though. I couldn't remember enough of what happened and it has been too long to go around digging about it."

He said. I couldn't read his face and that was bothering me but I decided not to push. There are somethings that are left untouched. Especially if it is to end in more pain.

The silence wrapped around us and it slowly lulled me down. With half lidded eyes I felt his arm wrap around and I snuggled in to keep away the darkness.

"Pi?"

"Hmm"

"You were scared weren't you? That night."

"You don't want to know the answer"

But somehow I think I know.