A Bucket List for Ella

Chapter 16

"Dude, she's my best friend, and I have a girlfriend."

"Alright, enough said."

The conversation ended and I heard footsteps coming down the hall. Quickly I pretended to be very interested in washing my face. Just in time, because I heard Liam say my name through the bathroom door that stood ajar.

"Ella? Can I come in?"

I opened the door.

"I've got to get home now love, but I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright. Do I get a kiss?" I teased.

"Of course."

Liam held my hand and kissed me once on the mouth, ever so softly, before I walked him to the door and he told me he loved me.

"Pillow fight!" Nico yelled girlishly after Liam left.

"No, I think I'll do without," I said dryly.

"Aww Elle, what's the matter?" Nico asked, pouting and resting his hands on my shoulders before pulling me into a headlock.

"Nico, don't," I warned.

But of course, he didn't listen. He proceeded to give me the biggest noogie I've ever experienced in my life. Not that I've experienced many.

Suddenly, he stopped. He slowly released my head from his grip and I straightened up, but not before I saw the cause for concern.

My hair had begun to fall out. Again.

"Oh," I choked out. I felt wetness on my cheek as I stared down at the small clump of hair, the hair I had just recently regained.

Without so much as another word, I stumbled off to my bedroom and climbed into bed. Nothing was going my way. I couldn't sleep on my stomach as usual, because the stitches on my boob would probably rub and then break, my hair was falling out, and worst of all, my cancer had returned. A shitty life is a life that might as well not be lived, I thought to myself.

I stared at the ceiling. Sobs were still affecting my breathing, making my breath come out in pants.

Then, so much like what I had done just months ago to him, Nico came into the dark room. He wordlessly slid into my bed beside me. He didn't need to say anything.

"You know, I would hug you right now, but my boob would probably fall apart," I told him quietly.

"Yeah...don't really want to stitch that back up for you. No offense."

"None taken," I said in response.

Nico lay quietly for a moment before speaking again.

"It was hard, you know."

I replied with, "What was?"

"Watching the surgery. It was hard. Not because of the surgery, but because of you."

"What do you mean by that?" I questioned.

"I mean that obviously no one deserves to get cancer, but I think that you especially don't deserve it. And I hated to have to see you go through that. Because until then, it was easy to forget that you were even sick."