Resisting the Bad Boy

[1] "Archer Cross"

    Not in a million years would I tell Leila of my feelings for Archer. And before you wonder why I fit in with the stereotype with everyone else to dawn over him, I have a different story of why. If we were going back that far, I actually met him first. When I was ten or so, I had fallen off my bike in front of his house, and he helped me up. I wasn't aware of who he was or who he'd become, but curse my ten-year-old self for not keeping more contact with him and trying to be friends. We even worked on school projects together in the younger grades, but it was strictly projects. He was always kind to me, a stark contrast to most of the other kids.

     In high school, the horizons were dramatically widened, and I was swallowed into the pool of nobody's while he was lifted into the pool of populars. I haven't talked to him since grade school, and now it's our senior year of high school.

     Archer Cross was out of my league.

     So, when we started high school, my feelings for him went away. If anything, my feelings turned to...let's say irritation to put it lightly? He was my first crush, and my last. My dumb-butt-middle-school-self just liked the cute, mysterious guy like the rest of the school, but my high school self doesn't get involved with relationships. Not anymore.

     I wasn't much to look at with my dark brown hair with red tints, making it look auburn, fair skin, and muddy green eyes, so I had never gotten much attention anyways. The only attention I received were fat jokes. Did I mention I was fat? Well, yes, I was the fat girl, and hence the jokes. Throughout the summer though, I lost a lot of weight and dropped a few sizes. Leila, of course, wasn't happy about my new appearances, but I liked the new me. It was finally something I could feel just a little proud of myself for. I even recently went on a date with a guy...but he cancelled our second date plans. That, to say the least, was a big confidence blow. Of course, fudging queen Leila made it well known I had been dumped while her relationship with Archer had been going strong for a couple months now.

     People, of course, ate that up so quick and didn't let me live it down until the school year had ended. I never said anything or stood up for myself just because the very thought petrifies me. You may not think so, but I'm not big on confrontation. I think Leila feeds on that and loves that I won't do crap about whatever she throws at me.

     I want to smack Archer for some irrational reason, but I know that's not a good idea. Just the idea has me shrinking. Everyone who's not his friend, is terrified of him, and if you want in those circles with him...just run like heck because it's not worth broken bones. One of his friends got in a fight with him once, about what no one knows, but he really destroyed the guy. They worked it out though and no charges were pressed either way.

     Anyways, there was still a little, teeny, tiny piece of me that resented him, but I've gotten over it. I didn't need saving, but he didn't really help anything. Sure, they were dating and all, but what kind of person let's his girlfriend torture her sister? Even when they were just friends and before they got together, he saw what she did to me every gosh darn day. I mean, jeez, junior year was the worst because she made all these fat jokes. Whatever, screw him.

     Moving on, I kinda sorta want to kill myself because of the death that comes tomorrow.

     High school.

     It's the first day of senior year and I wish I could just skip it and head off to college. Just thinking about where I want to go puts a smile on my face. For so long, I've been aspiring to go into the medical field and attend college at the Perelman School of Medicine in Philly. My main goal is to help people in need, but so many times I've thought about just quitting and never stepping foot inside a school again thanks to Leila.