Bleeding hearts.

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     I paced around the room as the doctor did the final check up, looking at the heart monitor and stuff

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     I paced around the room as the doctor did the final check up, looking at the heart monitor and stuff. He finally walked away from her bed and i stood, as he walked towards me. "Is she going to be alright, doctor? Is she going to wake up?" i asked, anxiously. He smiled softly and nodded, "she is just sleeping, the anaesthesia is still kicking in her system."
I turned and looked at the sleeping beauty on the hospital bed. "But it's been three days," i said.
He looked at me with a raised brow, "you've been here day and night for almost nine months, and you are worried about five days?!"
I remember her screams when i was dragged out of the theatre room and shaked my head, "thank you doctor."
He left and i walked to the crib next to Giannas bed. A smile making it's way to my face at the sight of the small bundle of joy stiring softly, eyes closed, fists clenched.

  As if sensing me, he fluttered his beautiful eyes open and for sure my breath was taken away, he was sure my child with Gianna, with honey-brown  skin. His head with little hairs. He squinted his eyes closed and opened his little mouth and started wailing loudly.
Uh-oh.
I picked him in my arms carefully and rocked him back and forth, trying to calm him down.
"Ssh.. Baby, sleep baby, sleep!" i croaked and he cried even harder,
Not good.
I tried some other way, "ssh.. Papa will buy you gellato, please don't cry!"

I heard a cackling sound behind me. I took a three sixty degree turn and my ears turned red in embarrassment, "please tell me you didn't hear that!"
  Gianna fluttered her eyes open and croaked a laugh out of her throat. Her eyes slid down to the baby in my hands and motioned for me to get closer, "can i carry him?"
  My eyes lit up and carried the sobbing baby to her and gently placed him in her hands. "Water please," she said.
I quickly took a glass and poured her some water. Holding the glass to her lips and she took long sips  then shaked her head. I pulled the seat next to her bed and sat there my hand itching to touch her now that she is awake, but i held the railing of the bed, "how are you feeling?"
"Like i just gave birth!" she barely threw a smile my way.
Is it a bad thing?
Then we fell in pin drop silence.

"Gia. I'm so sorry!"
"What exactly are you apologising for? Knocking me up? Me not aborting your child? Or was it the fact that you had sex with a whore?" the fire that was burning in her eyes was big and pretty scary. The anger blazing in her eyes when she looked at me, when she spat those words, were like bullets straight through my heart.
"I'm sorry," i bowed my head down.
"Damn right, you are!" she spat, her hand connecting with my cheek. Hard.

"I don't want to see you at the moment," she looked away, "You disgust me!"
She threw back the words i threw at her that night. The night that i made the biggest mistake of my life. The night i almost lost the love of my life.
"Gia, i know i deserve that. And more, but please-," i begged.
"Leave please, before i call the nurse," she looked down at the baby in her arms and rocked him back and forth, smiling sadly as he cried.

Nathan and Scarlett choose that time to enter the room. He walked me out, "you need to give her time, man."
I looked down, "i love her so much, Nate. And she hates me, it hurts."
He shaked his head, "hate you? No. She loves you more than she's ever loved anyone else in her life. But you hurt her. She has to heal first. You may have been by her side all that time, but she doesn't forget the words you said. At least not yet. She will forgive you when the time is right for her. She needs help Sandro. She isn't really stable with everything fresh in her mind."
"I understand," i said. Looking back inside i found her already looking at me, and she looked away quickly.
That stung.
I walked away silently.

    I don't know why, but when he walked away, his head down, i couldn't help but feel guilty

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    I don't know why, but when he walked away, his head down, i couldn't help but feel guilty. I wanted to call out to him to come back and hold me, but no.
I looked at the beautiful boy in my hands, sleeping, "he's the most beautiful thing ever!" i cooed,  kissing him on the forehead. Instantly, he opened his breathtaking eyes and i fell in love all over again. His eyes roamed around, all in silence, as if he was looking for something. Or someone.
  He started crying and my heart bled.
"He must have noticed his father is not around," Scarlett smiled sadly. I glared at her, i thought she was on my team.  She rolled her eyes, then held my gaze "want to know something?"
I nodded, "out with it!"
"Since he was born, Alessandro has been by his side day and night. Only leaving when he is asleep to freshen up or something in this bathroom. Five days, Gia! Five days, he's been here looking after your baby, here when he's crying and fed him when he's hungry. He even changed his clothes, washed him, changed his diapers. He is sorry Gia! He made a mistake, okay?" she started shouting, making the baby cry even harder. I tried to pat him to sleep or calm him down but he didn't want to.

       She breathed out loudly, closing her eyes in frustration, "He made a mistake, but don't do this to him. He hasn't eaten well for the nine months you were in a coma, he's been here day and night, waiting for you to wake up. Waiting to tell you how sorry he is. He was wrong, okay? He knows that, we know that. But he is willing to make it all right. Hell, he killed Kevin for you. What else do you want from him, Gia!"
    She kissed my baby boy on the forehead and stalked out, Nathan threw a small smile my way before running after her. And that's when the tears rolled down my cheeks.
Why am i the one feeling guilty?
  "Sshhh baby, it's okay," i rocked him back and forth.
Is it really? Is it okay, Gia?

Hey y'all sorry for the late update.
As you all know my nonna passed on last week.
I've been having some bonding time with my family and stuff.
Hope y'all understand and forgive me for the late update.

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