Not Another High School Love Story

18. What He Means to Me

"Let him go out, Jason, we can have dinner together some other time. It's Friday night, I remember what it was like to be seventeen, I'm sure you do too." Ms. Montgomery intervenes on my behalf, turning sentimental as she recalls a time that was probably over a century ago. Part of me wonders if she's just trying to keep herself out of the middle of another awkward exchange, but for some reason I get the sense it's more selfless than that.

"Where are you going?" My dad sighs, conceding. I'm surprised by how quickly he gives up, and when I look at Ms. Montgomery again it's more than just a fleeting glance.

"The football team's having their last game of the season." I give him honesty.

"Since when do you like football?" He wonders. Makes sense, he's never bothered getting to know me, but he obviously keeps score of how vastly different we are. How am I supposed to explain it? I can't tell him it's about Brent, he'll never understand what he means to me.

"Jonah's been tutoring one of the boys from the football team, remember? We owe him one for making sure we have a chance at winning the state conference tonight." Ms. Montgomery comes to my aid yet again, but I'm not entirely grateful. I don't want to be indebted to her, I'm just getting used to the new world order, I can't stand to mess it up now by accepting that she's a halfway decent person. She gives me another smile, "you've got a lot to be proud of."

"Yeah." Damn right I do, she has no idea. Suddenly it seems like I have the upper hand so I look at my dad and take a chance. "Please?"

"You going for that kid? Brent?" So close, but he's not like her and he definitely knows what's up. He shakes his head, disappointed, and doubles down harder than before. "I don't think it's a good idea, Jonah, every time you go around him you wind up doing something stupid. They'll probably have a party after the game and I don't want to get another call in the middle of the night to come pick you up at the police station. Or worse."

"That's not fair, the whole school's going to be there. I'm president of the yearbook committee, dad, I can't miss it." Logic seems like the best excuse.

"No, you're the one who's not being fair. I think I've been more than patient with you, but at some point I have to put my foot down for your own good. You can hate me for it all you want, but that's the way it's going to be. I'm sorry, but you haven't given me any reason to trust you when it comes to something like this, I don't want you going. Now, you can wash up and join us for dinner, or you can go to your room—your choice." His decision is made and he has no more use for me, so he starts to head back to the kitchen.

"Why are you such an asshole all the time?" It slips out, but I think I probably would've said it anyway even if I did still have a filter. Ms. Montgomery exclaims quietly, disapproving, but she doesn't have time to butt in as he turns back around to see me.

"What did you say to me?" The usual anger appears in my dad's voice, and he pauses for a second like he actually thinks I'll repeat it. I want to so bad, but even though I hate to admit it he scares me. When I go quiet he throws his hands up and continues. "See? This is exactly what I'm talking about, this kind of behavior didn't start until he came around. I'm not putting up with it anymore, do you hear me? I'm done, you're not to have any more contact with him whatsoever. I don't know what he's been saying to make you act like this, but it stops right now."

"No." There's no way I can make it clearer than that. He and Grace sound so much alike, I just wish they'd leave me alone about it. They should know by now it won't matter what they say, I won't let Brent go. "What are you going to do, follow me around at school? You can't stop me."