cinquante et un

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december 1

song rec: shedontknowbutsheknow - Tove Lo

chan's pov

chanchannie

1098 likeschanchannie boy crazy (i swear i'm not gay)tagged @j

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1098 likes
chanchannie boy crazy (i swear i'm not gay)
tagged @j.in @seunglove
view 266 comments
j.in love you hyungg
seunglove oldie in the middle 😔

lately i've had a song on repeat
and is currently on repeat.

hanging by the bar at sunrise

it's a good ass song.

with our bodies talking

but it hurts cause it reminds
me of so much shit.

hooked up last week, had a good time

from the pain she's been through.

so i regret nothing.

to seeing her like that.

i see her come close.

being there with her was the
easiest by hardest task in the world.

i wonder what you told her to make her stay.

seeing her beat herself up
over some coward.

she don't know what you did when you
come back home.

seeing her ruined in bruises.
cuts.
scratches.
scabs.
just hit so fucking close to home cause
i used to be this miserable over some girl.

she don't know what you're doin
out all night long.

maybe i'm just taking this too hard.

she don't know all the photos you've
got on your phone.

she's my little sister.
she's under my wing right now.
but it's so hard.

but she knows.

i love her to death.
but it's so hard.

she would rather smile and pretend with ya
than let go.

hyunjin is a good guy.
with good intentions cause god he loves her.
but she's scared.

blaming me for all the sadness.

i know things about him she doesn't.
but i can't tell her or else i would be
the reason she's hurting.

didn't know about you two.

hell if she knew the truth about jisung
and jeongin liking her at the same time
she started talking to hyunjin she'd be
the biggest wreck.

don't see i'm dragged into it.

all she wants and needs is the truth.
but in this case the truth will hurt.

this whole thing is on you.

jeongin had liked her ever since jisung
introduced him to her. he thought she was
fucking perfect as if she was the world. the sun.
the stars. the moon. the clouds. e v e r y t h i n g.

jeongin thought of changmin as his energy.
boy oh boy did he regret introducing hyunjin
to her so insanely fast but all he could do was
mope around in his room, punch walls, and scream
into his pillow for hours in end. maybe even sprinkle in some crying.

i see her heart break

jisung was a fucking wreck. god there is
so much to explain. i'll keep it short. they've
known each other since they were born. they
were by each other's hips from the beginning of time.

he thought it'd be a good idea for her to have
a new friend besides himself, jeongin and seungmin
so she wouldn't be as lonely.

he regretted it more than anything after
he saw the pair getting closer than ever.

still she's keeping face.

changmin can never know the
deepest parts of this though.

i was there for many of their sad
outbursts and they were just as messy as changmins.

sometimes even a little worse.

god who am i kidding no one can be as bad as changmins episodes.

but it's insane to see the two so fucking torn.

———————————————————————————
a rarely lengthy chapter.

sorry if this didn't make sense lol feelings are trash at this very moment so my heads all fuzzy.

i hope you liked my get to know me and i hope you liked this chapter!!!

keep voting and commenting it means the world to me!!

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