Chapter 14

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Thank you so much for the comments on the last chapter :)

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Harry was sitting on the grass right by the water, smoking, when Louis approached him. He was freezing but he'd never admit it or make an effort to go back. He wanted Harry to keep him warm.

Louis sat down next to him and didn't say anything for a few minutes, just stared ahead at the dark water.

"You're freezing." Harry said and Louis looked at him.


"Just a bit."

"Hold this."

Louis took the offered cigarette and watched Harry as he took off his jean jacket, before handing it to him.

"Take this."

"Uh...you sure?"

"Yeah."

Harry took the cigarette back as Louis dressed up with the jacket and buttoned it all the way up to his neck. He hugged his knees to his chest and stared at Harry as he smoked.

"So do you feel any different now that you're twenty?" he tried to make conversation.


"Same old shit but a different age."

"I just...why don't you think your birthday is important? You should be happy."

"Happy that twenty years ago I was born into an abusive home with two parents that didn't even give a shit? You want to know why I don't really care about birthdays?"


Louis nodded, unsure.


"I used to like birthdays when I was little. My mother would bake me a cake and then I'd wish for an even bigger cake the next year. But when I turned ten my mother wasn't home so I thought I'd celebrate it with my father. I went downstairs, obviously excited that I was turning ten and had made it through a decade. I told my father that it was my birthday and that I was turning ten, obviously excited about it. I still remember the look of indifference on his face when he shrugged and said 'so what'. It's stupid...but I remember that look on every single one of my birthdays."

He paused a moment before continuing.

"Then on my eleventh birthday they both forgot, and on my twelfth birthday my father said they didn't even plan on having me, they only wanted my older sister and that I was an accident. He was joking around, but that stuck in my head. They never celebrated my birthday after that, never got me any cake and didn't even bother wishing me a happy birthday. So yeah, I don't think it's a big deal."

Louis' heart hurt. It literally hurt from how much he wanted to just hug Harry and stroke his hair and tell him that he's happy that he was born.

"You know that there is a house full of people that came here to celebrate your birthday right?" Louis asked eventually and Harry shook his head.

"They're here for the free alcohol. People only care if they get something out of it."


"That's n-"

"Take my mother for example, she doesn't give a shit about me because she has nothing to gain from it. If I had a job she'd be kissing my ass. No one cares just because they do."

"I care." Louis said and Harry turned to look him in the eyes.

"I'm still trying to figure you out. You pretend to care because you don't want me telling people you're gay." Harry spoke and took a drag out of his cigarette.

Louis ignored his comment.

"Why do you always expect the worst in people?"

"Why don't you?"

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