Change Me (Tobias Eaton FanFiction)

1

It has been four years since Tris's death. I haven't really recovered at all these last years. Everyone wants me to move on, continue on with my life. But how could I. How could I move on from the loss of someone I loved. Someone that I wanted to protect, someone that I wanted to be with forever.

"Hey, Tobias! Earth to Tobias!" I snapped out of my thoughts and turned to face who was calling my name. It was Christina. I smiled at her. "Oh good your still here. I thought you were in Tris land or something." I chuckled.

"Something like that..." I looked down and my hands. Everyone was eating their food, but as usual, I don't eat anything.

"Tobias... you need to move on." She said calmly. I rolled my eyes. Everyone here always told me to move on. I shake my head.

"How do you want me to move on? Why do you even care that I still miss her? You took everything to calmly when she died when we threw her ashes. It looked like you didn't care. Like you don't even miss her." I snapped in a quiet voice.

"You think that I don't miss her!" Everyone got quiet and turned their heads to us. "Trust me, your not the only one here that does." She said. She got up and walked to a different table.

I know that the factions are gone, but she still has the mouth of a Candor...

I laugh at the thought. I checked the time at my watch. It was almost midnight. I got up from the table and walked to the hanger where my jacket was at.

"Hey, Tobias! You're leaving already?!" I turned around and saw that it was Zeke who called me.

I nod and shout back over the loud music, "Yeah! I need to go back home." Zeke just laughs at me.

"Come on stay for a while!" I shake my head.

"No! I can't maybe next time!" I put on my jacket and walked out of the restaurant and jogged down the street. It was really quiet at night. I love it when it's like this. I can actually think and focus. I continued walking, not paying attention to where I was walking. As I walked I saw a Ferris wheel. The Ferris wheel that Tris and I climbed on to find Eric's flag. I looked up at it. It was getting rustier and older. I went up to it and went up to the first step.

As I continued to climb up, it takes my breath away. Once I finally reached the top, I sat down on one of the bars. I looked around, enjoying the view. I closed my eyes and I could picture Tris and me here. It was like she never left. I slowly opened my eyes. And those images and memories were gone. I sighed and looked at my shoes.

Why? Why did she have to die? Why?

I wish she was here. I wish she was here to calm me down and to tell me that she loved me. But I know that is impossible. I jumped off from the bar and started to climb down the steps. As I reached the bottom, I checked my watch again. Midnight. I started to jog up to the road and walked into an alley. I walked to the back of the door of the apartments. I stepped inside, looking around if there was anyone around. Once the coast was clear, I went up the stairs. I reached the third floor, looking to see if anyone was around. I speed walked to the end of the hallway, opening room 310. I took off my shoes and my jacket.

I went to the bathroom to take a shower. I took off my shirt and my jeans. I turned on the water and stepped in. I stood there, letting the hot water relax my stiff muscles and to clear my mind. When the water started to get cold, I quickly washed my hair and body. When I was done, I wrapped my waist with a towel and went to my room. I stepped out of the towel, put on a pair of boxers, and changed into a pair of sweatpants.

The best thing about these apartments is that they are abandoned, which is a good thing. I can use any room I want to. And it's quiet.

I sat on the bed. I ran my hands through my face and hair. I close my eyes and I could see Tris, smiling at me. I smiled to myself. I could see the days I miss so much. I opened my eyes. I got up, went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Once I was done, I laid down on my bed and closed my eyes. Then I was asleep. I never really fallen asleep this quick, ever since Tris died. But what I love about it is that I can see Tris's face once again.

Before I have to wake up.