Yours Truly, Ramona

chapter twenty two | vertigo.

Luis is already stressed about Mary and the baby, and he needs something to take his mind off of it all.

I, on the other hand, need to make a journal entry. I reckon that changing foster homes is a big enough life event that deserves to be recorded in my journal.

I sit up in the bed, wincing at the thickness of the bandage around my ribs, and pull my body upwards. With a sigh of exhaustion, I collapse into the desk chair in front of the vanity and grab my journal from the top drawer, pulling out a pen right along with it.

February 17th, 2017 (Friday)

    I live with Owen now. I've only been here for a few days, but I already know I hate it. Owen is painfully nice to me, and it almost makes me feel bad for being mean to him. Almost. I mean, he's a grown man. He can get over himself.

    I do like that I get to see Mason, though. I get to say good morning to him and see him when he comes home from school. It's probably the only good thing about living here.

    But, on the other hand, I got in trouble for smoking weed again. Jean and Owen found it in a blood test when I went to the hospital. Jean says she's going to tell the police and I might get sent to juvie, but I highly doubt that.

    She just doesn't have the heart to send me to juvie. The only reason she told the police last time is because she knew they would probably only give me a warning. This time, though, I have a feeling I'd get a little more than a warning.

    I was in the hospital because of Allen, who actually tried apologizing to me when I went to go get my things from his house.

    And Jasper and I kissed. I miss him, and Monday can't come fast enough.
                       
              Yours Truly,
                            Ramona

~

Sunday night came slowly, the boring days dragging by.

My attitude was hard to balance. Between being unbelievably sweet to Mason and being an unwavering dick to Owen, my mind struggled to find a balance.

My anger never really left me, it just became a part of me.

And not to mention, I miss Luis, Nadia, Reece, and Jasper. Even Xavier.

I miss all of those crazy, annoying sons of bitches.

The one thing I'm not looking forward to, though, is having to tell Nadia I'm quitting the dance team. I had decided to quit last night while I was contemplating my life.

I was laying in bed, unable to fall asleep as usual, and I realized that I really don't enjoy dance anymore. Nadia won't be happy with me, especially because we've got regionals coming up.

"So, I can take you to school tomorrow, Ramona. You don't have to take the city bus anymore," Owen says at dinner on Sunday night.

"No. I'm good," I respond flatly, not bothering to glance in his direction.

I'm busy studying Mason's face. The way he eagerly scoops his food into his mouth says a lot about the way we grew up. I guess not always knowing when your next meal will be can fuck a kid up. I mean, who knew?

"Are you sure?" Owen asks calmly, still looking directly at me.

"Yep."

My mind is unwaveringly angry with this entire situation, so irritated, but I don't feel any of it. It's like my mind is telling me what I should feel but my body is unable to show it.