Chapter 7.

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(Brendon's p.o.v)

The sound of owls woke me up. It was a soothing noise, just super annoying after awhile. I want to yell 'Shut up' but I realized the person sleeping right next to me, Ryan. I smile to myself and stroke his hair. I'm guessing it's about 10 a.m because of the daylight behind the fog outside. From where I live, it's always foggy, we never have a sunny day, and if we do it only shines through one part of the clouds.

So it's the weekend and I don't know what to do. Usually me and Ryan would hang out somewhere, but I don't know if he would want to considering we are kind of awkward. Well we aren't really, I mean we are literally sleeping together, side by side. Honestly, it's nicer like this than in his cat form.

Sometimes I still call him Fluffy, but he doesn't really mind, he just laughs at me when I say it. I still like him as a cat, even though every once in awhile I wish there was a cure so he could stay this way forever. Like let's say one day we kiss (I don't think it's ever going to happen, but just go with it.) and then before we kiss, he turns into a cat. I mean how embarrassing would that be? I feel bad for him, but he seems like it isn't such a big deal.

I worry though, his owner visits me at work like everyday and asks about Ryan, of course I say I don't know, but It's still kind of horrifying knowing that someone is after your cat/crush/human. Yeah, he's my crush. I like him, deal with it. I think he likes me. I know he admitted it, but what if he just felt bad. I mean, he made no effort afterwards to show me that he likes me, but at the same time it would be cat of weird to go out with your owner. I understand why he wouldn't want me, and that's okay.

Ryan stirred, mumbling something under his breath. When he mumbles things, he is absoutly adorable. He doesn't even know half of what I feel for him. He doesn't know a thing. The journel was just a third of my feelings. I don't write in my journal anymore, I just keep it hidden because it's still important to me.

Ryan's hands glided across my chest lazily, I don't think he realizes what he just did. I kept my hand in his hair, rubbing his scalp, he likes it I when I pet him. I looked down at him and smirked. His mouth was parted open and he looks in peace.

I want to get up and make breakfast so when he wakes up it'll be ready for him, but I don't want to move from this spot. It's so at ease right now, it might not be like that for awhile. We might not be able to have moments like these again, but that's just me being paranoid.

Right now, in time, I have never felt so relaxed. I feel loved, even if that person doesn't love me, I feel alive, I feel like a real person, I feel like I should exist, I feel I finally have something to live for, I finally have someone. Just having someone in your presence makes everything feel better, not so alone all the time. I don't feel like my parents hate me, even though they don't, they just don't have time for me anymore. Even at school, I don't care that I'm a lonely bastard, I have something to look forward to when I get home. No more nightmares, no more wanting to kill my-.

"Brendon?" I heard a whisper. I zoned out of my thought and glanced down at my angel. "Are you okay, you look sad."

I smile at him, a real smile, and brush the piece of hair in front of his eyes behind his ears, "I'm Okay." I'm okay, I'm really okay. He grins at me and then sneaks his hand under my shirt, on my stomach. My insides just turned, I hope he didn't feel that.

"Your so warm," Ryan snuggles into my stomach, hand under my shirt, touching my bare skin. I wanted to say 'Only because you are here,' but I don't want to make things go down hill. So instead I said, "Thank you." He nods into my chest.

I want to see his beautiful honey eyes again, I only got a quick glance this morning. We lay there, me staring at the ceiling and him trying to sleep once again, well he's a cat, he sleeps a lot.

"Want to know something?" I say out of no where. He lifts his head from me and looks at me. He shifts in his spot so that he is turned on his side. "Your my only friend," I am completely honest about this, I've never really had friends.

"Want to know something as well?" He replies. I nod, "Your my only friend too," He says. A blush rises to my cheek and I want to look away from his stare, but it's so hypnotizing.

"Well I feel honored then," I say with a smile. He smirks and looks away from the gaze. I purse my lips and try to think of something to say. "So what do you want to do today?" I break the silence again. He thinks for a moment and looks outside.

"We could go for a walk somewhere?" He said shyly. I roll my eyes, "You can't go outside remember, your owner is still looking for you." I poke his stomach. He giggles at the poke and pushes me, which causes me to fall off the couch. I wasn't going down alone, and I grabbed him before I crashed onto the floor, bringing him down.

"Ow." Ryan muttered. He was lying on top of me, skin to skin, chest to chest. He lifts him self up and he sits on my stomach straddling me. He blushes a crimson red, "Your fault for pushing me," I tease him, lifting a eyebrow. He rolls his eyes and mouths 'Whatever'

"By the way, she's not my owner," He whispers to himself. I chuckle and he looks anywhere but me. I want to stroke his cheek and put my lips to him, but I can't.

"Your expressions are so obvious," Ryan says. I roll my eyes once again and put my hands on his hips. He looks at me scaredly.

"We should go hiking today," I say with a grin. He side smirks and nods. After that he gets off which causes me to lose my grip on him.

"Go get dressed, I'll make us snacks and breakfast," I say, walking into the kitchen.

"Not hungry!" He yells from my bedroom. "Too bad!" I yell back. I could just hear him groan.

I pack us some granola bars, apples, and water. I made two bowls of cereal and set them out on the table. I packed everything in my backpack and went over to my room

I should really call it me and Ryan's room now that he practically lives here.

I got dressed while Ryan was in the shower. After he was done, I showered quickly after so we can eat together.

Finally I went into the kitchen and saw him sitting at the table poking the cereal with his spoon. "Come on , eat." I say hurriedly.

"I can't. I'm gaining weight." He says sadly and looks at the floor. I stop everything I'm doing and lay the backpack on the counter. Is this kid serious?

"Are you really saying that Ryan?" I say kind of angrily. He looks a little taken aback and nods. I scoff and squeeze the bridge of my nose with my fingers.

"Do you really not know how beautiful you are!?" I yell, close to tears.

I don't know why I am so emotional over this, but having someone in your life this close to you, you don't want them to feel bad about themselves at all.

"God- your fucking beautiful," I say quieter, putting a hand over my face. I felt something around me. I came out of my little cave and saw Ryan, hugging me.

He's smiling.

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