Smash Into You

Chapter 29: ILYSB

I gave her another smile and gently placed my hand on top of her head, brushing away the few stray hairs that matted into her eyes and forehead before letting my hand drop to her neck. Then slowly, I carefully pulled her into me as I leaned down and kissed her forehead.

I let my lips linger, mumbling desperately, "Baby, please stop crying. You are breaking my heart."

Without another word, I pulled away and dropped my hand to hers, tugging on her wrist. Taking a slow step back, still holding on to her, I watched as she allowed her arm to be dragged out all the way before following me slowly.

I continued to watched her walk behind me all the way to the steps, but when it came time to climb them I shifted my hand so I was lacing all my fingers with hers, holding her hand securely before making our way to her apartment.

When we got there, I let go of her hand to take off my shoes. When I did, she walked past me, making a left and disappearing down the hall. I continued to take off my shoes, but also took off my socks, jeans, and shirt as well, piling them near the door before moving to follow her.

It was freezing because of the rain, I was soaked head to toe. I shivered as I walked towards the open bedroom door, seeing that Lauren had been taking off her clothes too, her back facing me. When I reached the doorway, she was only in her underwear, just like me. Her body slightly glistened from the droplets of water that were still running down her back, hips, legs, and hair.

I watched as she stood there for a moment, her fingertips running down her hips as she stared down at the bed she was standing in front of. Even from where I stood I knew she was getting lost in her thoughts, her mind wandering to how she had to beg for me to stay with her. Straightening up, I closed the distance between us, desperate to take her pain away.

I pressed my chest against her back, wrapping my arms around her waist as I pulled her into me. She was surprised by the contact and stiffened, but it was only for second later that she relaxed and leaned back into me. Placing my chin on her shoulder, I squeezed her lightly before nuzzling into her hair and cheek, mumbling right into her ear, "I'm so sorry..."

The breath at her ear made her shiver. Then with a small huff that sounded like a half chuckle, she placed on arm over mine and brought a hand to my neck, scratching my skin and hair softly as she murmured, "It's okay Camz, I just got a bit emotional, that's all."

I shook my head, running my lips against her skin, as I miserably whispered, "No, you were hurt, I hurt you, and I'm sorry."

She sighed again as she kept her fingers tangled within my hair. Running her hand across my arms she soothed, "Stop it, don't get all upset just when I was just starting to feel better."

I squeezed her a little tighter, "I can't help it..."

With that, she twisted within my grip. I backed away, thinking she wanted her space, but she only turned around and stepped right back into my arms, running both of her hands up my neck. One stayed at the back while the other ran to my cheek. Her green eyes looked into mine, and with a comforting little smile, she mumbled, "I'm happy you are here, I am. You don't have to beat yourself up just because I ended up crying. I cry when I'm overwhelmed with just... everything. It wasn't all you, I was just... scared... and upset– and I thought for a moment, just for a moment, I lost you..."

My facial expression must have been broken and sad when her last sentence slipped between us. I shook my head and looked away, feeling an overwhelming sense of failure running through me. I wanted to cry, to just curl up and sit in darkness. If Lauren had truly thought she lost me, then I honestly have neglected her to the point of no salvation.