In Time

-Fifteen-

15 April 2017, Saturday

------

It was our Saturday again, our weekly hangout day at Crestbridge Park. Yesterday Mr Lee announced Diana's suicide to the whole school during morning assembly. Everyone was definitely shocked at the news; Diana was seemed like a perfect girl living the perfect life to others on the outside. Nobody knew that she was in the Blood Eagles, that the gang did such a terrible thing to her, and that she was dying inside, despite the brave front that she tried to put up all this time.

I could tell that Jon was saddened by the news as well. It was one thing to be disappointed when your crush who seemed like an angel was a gang member, but another thing altogether when she died so suddenly, just as Diana did. Nevertheless, he was still the same old Jon and he challenged Aus for a bicycle race to the end of the park as soon as we got our rented bicycles. Or perhaps that was Jon's way of venting out his frustration.

I pedaled along slowly with George, taking my eyes off the road occasionally to watch the children play, the elderly do their exercise routines, the joggers living out their healthy active lifestyle. It was sad that the world went on just as usual, even after Diana's death. Just like yesterday, the day before, and the other day before. To those who didn't know Diana, it was as if her existence meant nothing to them, not even the fact that she had permanently left the world.

I looked over to George. She was cycling, but her eyes weren't on the road either. She was thinking. Perhaps we were thinking about the same thing. She seemed so downcast, and I wanted to ask her about it. But then I realised that I never knew how to broach such a subject with George; Jon was always around to do all the talking.

"A penny for your thoughts," I attempted.

"Nah, just thinking about life."

I waited.

"And death. And my whole existence basically."

"What do you mean?" I probed.

"Let me ask you Xavier. If I hadn't told you, would you realise that these bushes are brimming with chrysanthemum flowers?"

I slowed down my pedaling to take a closer look at the greenery lining the side of the pathway. George was right! Upon closer scrutiny, the bushes were filled with chrysanthemums, but their green coloured petals blended in too well with the surrounding foliage. I'd cycled by this same path numerous times, but I had always gone by too fast to even realise the existence of these flowers.

"Y'know Xavier, sometimes I feel like these flowers. I mean I'm always around, but people just don't realise that I'm there," George admitted dejectedly as she cycled up beside me.

"Are you okay? Don't worry, we have always acknowledged your existence. Perhaps it's a guy thing so we don't really claim to be 'BFF's all the time..."

George hung her head. "You don't get what I mean. I know that you all appreciate me as a friend. But never anything more than a friend."

I got it! George must have liked Jon! That would explain her 'extra' concern for him all the time. And her smugness when Jon was disappointed in Diana. Because then she would perhaps get a chance for Jon to notice her, finally, as a girl. I couldn't believe that I'd been oblivious to her feelings all these while.

"George, I know what you mean. You want Jon to see you. As a girl."

"Shhhh! Stop it!" she waved her arms frantically in the air before rushing back to the hand grips of her bike as it swerved precariously. "I...I just want him to know that I care about him, more than a friend, more than a bro," she admitted after regaining her composure.