Shawn Mendes imagines

Not good enough

Y/n POV
Me and Shawn were watching a tv show.
"I just want you to know I love you and we are family"
The mom in the show says hugging her 2 teenage children. I get goosebumps because I longed for that feeling. "Are you cold babe" Shawn says looking at my goosebumps. "No I'm not. It's just......... uh...... I have to use the bathroom" I say hurrying away before my tears could escape. I get in the bathroom and shut the door. My family always treats me like shit even when I was younger. I had friends but it wasn't the same. I wipe my tears, flush the toilet to make it seem like I used the bathroom, washed my hands and went out.
Shawn's POV
I see that something is wrong but don't ask.

~later~

We are starting to fall asleep in the bedroom but I stay awake incase y/n needs me. She gets out of bed and puts something I think paper on the bed.
"I know you are sleeping but I just wanted to say I love you so much more than words can describe and I want you to know you didn't do anything wrong I was broken and depressed before I met you and you helped me even though you didn't know it. But I'm hurting too much and I have to go forever and I'm sorry. But don't cry over me it's better for you I won't drag you down. Just remember don't cry over me just look up at the sky and say goodbye. I love you so so much your so beautiful inside and out. You inspire me so much I love you so much goodbye." Y/n says. She's crying. I sit up immediately and look at her. "Where are you going?" I ask staring at her "I'm going to kill myself" she says crying more. "Is it because I'm not enough or-" " no it's because I'm not good enough for you. I'm broken and worthless and my family treats me like shit that's why I went to the bathroom because I've never felt that love before except from you and I was jealous even though it's just a show and your so perfect I couldn't be enough for you" y/n says cutting me off.
Her face in her hands. I hug her tightly a just sit there in silence and she cries in my chest. It breaks my heart seeing her like this. "Your good enough for me. Better the good enough and I couldn't ask for more why didn't you tell me sooner" I ask stroking her hair.
" I knew you'd hate me no one wants a broken girl" y/n says. "Look at me" I say, she shakes her head "why can't you look at me" I say softening my voice. "I can't because you will look in my eyes and see how broken I am and then you might cry and I would hurt you. I don't want to hurt you i never did" y/n says. She finally looks up at me with bloodshot eyes. "I love you so much ok" I say hugging her again. "I love you too"