Dare || m.c.

➵ 0.2 - jade

"What were you doing with him?" Ashton asked in the old beat up car.

Jade groaned, really not wanting to talk about that self absorbed prick. "I was doing nothing with him. He was being himself."

Ashton laughed and it was the only source of stability in Jade's life. She was so grateful that she had him. Without Ashton, she would've been a lost cause.

In some ways, she was a lost cause. There were small things that people tended to neglect, but Jade kept track of them. Like the last time she cried. It was well over two years ago, when her father died. That was the last day Jade cried. It wouldn't seem like a big deal to most people, but it meant a lot to Jade. Or the last time she hoped for something. She had childishly hoped that things would be the same after her father's death. They hadn't been. After that, Jade knew that hope was stupid. It set you up for disappointment.

"He doesn't even know who I am," Jade complained. She didn't care if people knew her or not. She tried to avoid attracting any attention to herself, but it did sting sometimes when people said they didn't know her. She had been going to school with Michael for the past year and a half and even shared a couple of classes together. But Michael was Michael and didn't deem anyone worthy of his grace.

"Fuck him," Ashton shrugged easily, not finding anything wrong with the situation. He wasn't one to stress over little things, but Jade was. Even though she wanted nothing to do with Michael, it still stung a little when he clearly knew nothing about her existence.

Jade made a face, obviously not amused with the thought. "I'd rather not."

They were quiet for a while and Jade leaned her head against the window, closing her eyes. These silences with Ashton were her favorite thing. They could both be silent for hours and know exactly what the other was thinking. This was why they never talked on the phone, because neither of them could actually keep up with the conversation. Silence was their language and they spoke it better than anything.

"What happened today?" Ashton asked after he parked the car outside the trailer that Jade shared with her mother.

"Fucking Alicia Williams happened," Jade muttered. "She came in with her minions and made me sing happy birthday to her. I would've backhanded the bitch if I didn't need the money so badly."

"I would've loved to see that," Ashton laughed quietly. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes and offered one to Jade, who took it and placed it between her teeth. Ashton took out a lighter and lit the roll of paper, before lighting his own.

A minute or so later, Ashton took her free hand in his and Jade knew what he was thinking. They'd had this conversation many times and Jade even had some parts of it memorized.

"We could do it, you know," Ashton said softly.

"No, we couldn't," Jade shook her head. She didn't blame Ashton for wanting to run away. She would do it with him, for him, if she didn't have her mom waiting for her in that trailer.

Well, she wasn't exactly waiting, but Jade liked to humor herself. It was better than facing and accepting the harsh reality.

"Jade, you've got nothing to lose," Ashton said. "I don't understand why you keep insisting on staying in this hellhole. I'd pay for you, J, I'd keep you safe. You won't have to worry about shitty jobs and asshole dudes. You could leave this nightmare behind you and live your own life."

"I can't, Ashton. You know I can't." Jade hated talking about this with him. It always ended the same way. They never reached any compromise.

Here it comes.

"Yes, you fucking can. There's nothing holding you back!"

Jade threw her lit cigarette out the open window. "My mom needs me, Ashton. I'm not going to leave her." She tried to be calm, for both their sakes. There was no fucking way she could leave her mom.

Ashton ran a hand through his hair as he took another drag from the cigarette. "Your mother doesn't even know you half the fucking time, J. You can't stop your life for her. You need to live for yourself."

Jade bit her lip, a lump forming in her throat. "You don't get it, Ash. She's the only family I have left. I can't just give her up."

"What about me, J?" Ashton questioned, loosening his grip on Jade's hand. "Didn't you say I was your family?"

Jade squeezed his hand, not wanting to let go. "You are family, Ash. You always will be. But you know I can't leave my mom. I'm all she has. She needs me."

Ashton reached across and hugged her. "One day, Jade, you're going to realize that you're not responsible for taking care of your mother. She should be taking care of you. And when that day comes, I'll be waiting for you."

Jade shook her head against his shoulder. "You'll be wasting your time then, Ashton. I'm not leaving her."

They sat there in the car, Ashton holding her close to him and neither of them saying anything. All talk of leaving was done for the night. The conversation always reached an unspoken and unannounced end, just like tonight.

"How's Beth?" Jade asked suddenly.

"Ah, Beth." Ashton let out a long sigh. "Did you know her middle name is Freya?"

"How would I know?" Jade laughed shakily.

Beth lived down the street from Ashton and had him wrapped around her little fingers, even though she didn't realize it. Ashton did whatever she asked him to do, whenever she asked him to do it. It didn't matter if it was in broad daylight or in the middle of the night. Once, Beth got sick and Ashton had skipped school so he could spend the day with her. Jade thought they were the cutest thing ever.

"Well, it's Freya," Ashton said and Jade could hear the smile in his voice. "Beth Freya Downs."

Jade smiled into his shoulder. "Just ask her out already."

Ashton sighed again, but this time it was defeated. "I can't, J. We've talked about this. I'm not what she needs."

Jade didn't understand. He was willing to drop everything if she would run away with him, but he couldn't ask a girl out.

"How would you know what she needs? Have you asked her?"

"She's not like you, Jade. She hasn't seen the ugly in this world. If she's with me, that's all I've got to offer her. She deserves more."

Jade found his answer a little funny. "So you're saying you don't mind offering me the ugly?" she said jokingly.

"I'm saying that you know the world isn't all flowers and rainbows. You understand it. You've seen it. I don't want Beth to have to see something she doesn't have to."

Jade could kind of see where Ashton was coming from, but she didn't agree with him. He couldn't protect everyone from everything. Beth wouldn't always stay innocent. Sooner or later, she would see the "ugly" in the world. It seemed that Ashton preferred it to be later. Jade understood that.

She yawned, suddenly feeling extremely tired. "I'll see you tomorrow, Ash."

Ashton let her go and Jade stepped out of the car. He watched her walk the small distance to the trailer and she waved once before heading inside. Sometimes Jade waited for Ashton to drive away before stepping in the trailer, but today was not one of those days.

Today was one of those days where Ashton waited and watched Jade go inside the tiny trailer.

-

i hope you guys liked this their conversation will make sense soon for now it kinda just shows their friendship. please vote and if you enjoyed it then comment 'popcorn' and i will love you a lot

this chapter is dedicated to Paige aka fivesaucewhoop bc she's the best and i love her stories more than anything.

talk to me on twitter @micahlclifford bc i'm bored and that's it byee. until next time -S