"So you learned how to kickbox?" My dad asked. We were sitting in his office talking. My father hates the tension between me and twins so much. He doesn't blame me for anything that has happened, I would've been mad if he did. I am just glad they not forcing us to make up.
This is as nice as I can get with the twins. 'Sorry' won't make up the years of pain and helplessness I suffered. As harsh as it sounds, I refuse to be swayed easily by those two and the rest of my tormentors. I don't want to inflict physical harm on any one, just don't test me.
I have one of the most strongest weapon known to man.
Guilt.
Is it bad that I want them to suffer. That I want them to feel like they living in hell, that I want them to realize no amount of guilt, remorse or apologies will make up for past mistakes, the only thing they deserve is retribution.
Yes, yes it does. But I don't fucking care.
I'll rub some salt on open wounds. Especially to those who stood and laughed at my pain. To those who helped bully me because 'everyone was doing it'. I want them to know I came back stronger and wiser.
"Hello, earth to Ally. You still space out a lot? " My dad said with a smile. I smiled back, it's impossible not to.
"Old habits die hard I guess." I really didn't want to talk to about what happened earlier.
"I know you will most likely never forgive the twins for what they did to you right now, but don't waste your time hating them. Life is unexpected."
"Dad I don't hate them." lie "I just find it hard to forgive them for the seven years of pain they put me through. Maybe one day I will trust and love them the way I did before. But right now I'm not ready, but I will try. " another lie, I am really scared of letting Kathy and Hayden in my life again.
If they could changed over night once, they can change over night again. I'm not taking chances.
I was about to walk out the door when my dad said.
"Don't think I didn't notice how you avoided all my questions. "
He didn't question me and I was grateful for that.
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That night I lay in my bed awake. It felt like I had the weight of the world on my shoulders. Should I forgive my brother and sister? Should I forgive those people who helped make my life hell? Do I need to be the better person and 'forgive thy man for they do not know what they are doing?'
What the hell am I thinking?
I am not Nelson Mandela.
I am Nathalie Williams and I deserve to be angry about what was done to me.
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Hate You, Hate You Not. (unedited)
Teen Fiction"I tried to stay way." "I know." "Then why do I still feel this way?" "You didn't try hard enough." "I tried to hate you." "I know. I wish you hated me enough to stay away."
