The (not so) Good Girls Bad Boys: The Good, The Bad and The Abandoned

30- I'M A FREAKIN QUEEN!

One... two... three... four... um, five...? Wait, not five... no, yes, five. Five...six... seven... eight...

I counted the empty beer bottles on the counter in front of me, but it was hard because they kept on doubling and merging back into each other before doubling again. My face was resting on one fist while my other hand was pointed towards the bottles, my shaky finger outstretched to tap each top of the glass. I giggled at my thoughts and my head sank, dragging down my arm before resting on the top of the table.

Why was six afraid of seven...? I joked to myself.

I laughed loudly and snorted. When the unladylike sound exploded from my mouth, I slapped a hand over my lips and giggled some more.

Because seven eight (ate) nine...

I giggled some more and felt myself slipping out of my chair before I caught myself and pulled myself back up.

I'm so clever... seven eight nine... classic... Claaaaassic Lexi!

I tried to count the empty bottles that I had drunken... wait no... drank? Dranken? Whatever. Anyway, they looked all fuzzy and wouldn't hold still. They kept swaying from side, to side, to side... to side... to... side....

I suddenly felt myself falling and whimpered as my butt hit the ground, hard. I jutted out my bottom lip and kicked the ground, trying to get revenge.

"Stupid ground!" I slurred, "stop hitting me!"

I noticed a few people looking at me weirdly but they didn't say anything. They were just lucky that the ground wasn't being mean to them.

The ground, being extraordinarily rude, didn't even apologize as I stood up and tried to make my way to the fridge. The floor swayed beneath my feet and I stumbled multiple times trying to get to the fridge. After the third time of nearly stumbling, I finally had enough and started jumping on the ground, trying to kick it so it would stop moving and trying to trip me.

Tears swelled up in my eyes and I sniffled, finally giving up on trying to get the floor to stop tripping me.

"S-stupid floor," I sniffled, "what did I ever do to you?"

Oh wait... I kicked it and beat it up... maybe I deserved being bullied by the floor. I mean, it does just get walked all over all day. No one respects the poor floor...

"Sorry, Mr. floor. You deserve a raise for the things you're put through." I leaned down and patted the floor softly in reassurance. Then I remembered the fridge and stood back up, almost stumbling over in the process.

"I need more beer..." I stated matter-of-factly. Wrapping my hand around to handle of the refrigerator, I swung the door open and peered inside, searching for a brown bottle. I frowned when I only found water and these little cans that said... Bud...weiser?

"Gesundheit," I mumbled while trying to pronounce the label. Oh well. I didn't want this... Budweiser. I wanted beer. And water is just boring. I wanted something that would make my mouth a party, water is like my mouth going to a funeral. Laaaame.

I frowned at my findings and looked around for something else to drink. That's when I saw it.

"Score!" I shouted before running towards the kitchen table. Snacks and beverages littered the table but only one thing caught my attention. "Fruit Punch!"