Dear Virgil Sanders [✔️]

Chapter 3: For Forever

"See Remy, I told you he'd care." Emile said to his husband.

Patton rolled his eyes. "He was always mean to me, I'm surprised he had a friend... I mean considering he shoved you over yesterday, I didn't think it was true."

"We were joking haha!" Again, he lied.

Emile stood and pulled Virgil into a hug. "Thank you... for being friends with him.. you must've meant a lot to him if he.." the man trailed off, pulling away to look Virgil in the eyes. "Thank you so much.. I.. if it's not too much.. we would love to have you over for dinner tonight? Maybe talking about what a good friend Janus was might... help us through our grieving.." Emile shot a meaningful glance at Patton who looked more annoyed at his father than sad at his brothers death.

"I-I would be more than happy to come over!" Virgil smiled, jotted down their address and left for class again.

Roman grabbed him before Virgil could slip away to the drama room. "What was that about?"

"What do you mean?" Virgil asked, not wanting to explain the situation he put himself in.

"The Picani's? What did they say?"

Virgil sighed. "I'm going to their house to talk about Janus.. what do I even say? I didn't know the kid?"

"Just say yes to whatever questions they have. Don't make things hard for yourself, man."

Virgil nodded and left, not wanting to talk about it anymore.

A few hours later he was pulling on his jacket to leave when his dad walked in.

"Heya kiddo, where you off to?" Thomas asked his son when he went to start dinner.

Virgil panicked. "I um... I'm going to Roman's house."

Thomas smiled and hugged him. "Have fun kiddo- wait, did someone sign your cast?"

"Yeah.. it was some kid who felt bad for me."

"Did you know.. Janus?" Thomas read off of his cast.

Virgil nodded. "Roman's waiting dad I really have to go. I love you."

"Love you too."

The Picani's house is anything but small. Boasting a solid three bedroom, one guest room with four bathrooms and a den, it was rather nice. Virgil rubbed his sweaty palm against his slacks before knocking, his purple and black stripped polo not covering his cast as his jacket usually did.

Barely a second after he knocked a bored looking Patton opened the door, his eyes brightening the tiniest bit at the sight of someone who wasn't worrying about the dinner - though in reality Virgil was terrified about tonight.

"Virgil, come in."

Scanning the house as he walked through the main hall, he saw a family room that looked like it hadn't been used in ages, a stairwell probably leading to the bedrooms and the dinning room that was connected to the kitchen. All in all it was a lovely house and though the family that lived in it was broken, no one could tell from the look of things.

Patton showed Virgil his seat at the dinning room, the seat he assumed belonged to Janus. As Emile and Remy filed in with a small but delicious looking spaghetti dinner, he said hellos and the like.

"Virgil, thank you so much for coming, you have no idea how much it means to us." Emile said, gently patting his hand.

Remy nodded. "Yeah, we've been pretty... all over the place with our emotions," he spared a glance at Patton, "so having someone to help show us all of what a great friend our son was will help."

Virgil smiled awkwardly. "I... why thank you, I don't know where to start..."

"What was one of your happiest memories with Janus?" Emile inquired, a smile dancing on the edges of his lips.

"I..." Virgil stopped for a moment. What should he say? "Well it was end of May or early June, a picture perfect afternoon we shared. Drive the winding country roads. Stopped by this ice cream place I forgot the name of-"

"Ala mode." Patton suggested, knowing it was Janus's favorite.

"Yeah, grab a scoop at ala mode and then we're there. An open field that's framed with trees, we pick a spot and shoot the breeze, like buddies do. He quoted songs from his favorite bands, and I told jokes no one would understand except us two. And we talk and take in the view..."

Virgil spoke with care, trying to paint the image of himself telling jokes to Janus and him not shoving him to the side, but laughing and joking along.

He looked out the window just above Patton's head. "All we'd see is sky, for forever we let the world pass by, for forever. Feels like we could go on for forever this way. Two friends, on a perfect day..." how should he tie it in to make it real? Virgil scratched his arm nervously, his fingers hitting his cast and he knew just what to do. "And there he goes, racing towards the tallest tree! From far across the yellow field I'd hear him calling 'follow me'! There we go wondering how the world might look from up so high! One foot after the other! One branch then to another! I climb higher and higher! I climb until the entire sun shines on my face!" Flashes from the real event came and went from Virgil's mind as he tried his best to rewrite the story.

"And I suddenly feel the branch give way..." he felt the room spinning. Somehow his mouth managed to excuse himself to the bathroom, where he locked the door and slumped on the floor next to it. His breathing quickened, his heart pounding. He heard their concerned voices as he sat. He was on he ground- he thought back to what he would've said. His arm was numb- a knock, Patton's voice "Virgil?" He looked around and he saw him come to get me.

He's come to get me.

And everything's okay...

Virgil stood, gripping the sink and splashing water on his face. All they'd see was sky for forever... they'd let the world pass by for forever. It was just him and I for forever this way... this way...

He made his way out to the dinning room again, trailed by Patton who looked concerned.

"Virgil, honey are you okay?" Emile asked, Remy standing to get him a glass of water.

"Yes yes I'm just... so overwhelmed... I didn't know he killed himself... it was all so much to process today I... I'm sorry.."

Remy smiled softly. "Don't be sorry kiddo, we're here to help you through this as well."

Virgil hated the lies that had to burn through his vocal chords but it made them happy so what did it matter.

Patton nodded. "I agree. Though your version of Janus isn't quite what I remember of him."

"Patton-" Emile warned, not wanting to ruin the peace they had just created.

"I just thought I'd share, dad..."

Remy nodded. "Another time kiddo, I think Virgil might just want to take a breather and talk about something light hearted."

"Yeah definitely."

"So, Virgil, how did you and Janus talk? He was always grounded so his phone was taken away and he had his laptop for school but that was it." Emile asked him curiously.

Virgil chuckled. "Well we actually had a hidden email. Which was probably why his suicide note addressed me fully, that's how we'd talk. 'Dear Jay Picani, Sincerely, me.'"