The Perfect Emma

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Emma Mabel

Speaking up for herself was difficult - but after? Well, Emma was really glad she did. She was able to be with Grayson and feel safe without getting pulled away against her will. Sure - Hannah was pissed about it but Emma didn't care. Being around Grayson made her feel both safe and comfortable. It helped her slowly transition back to her old self - a challenge, most certainly, but progress.

It had been about a week since the day that Emma argued being able to stay with Grayson. She wasn't back to her old self completely, definitely had a long way to go, but she was better. Though certain habits that she had beaten into her remained, she was able to balance herself out a bit more. Sure, she still had the occasional panic attack but she was much better. For one, seeing short haired males with blond hair didn't always send her into having a panic attack. That progress can most definitely be credited to her therapist that she had begun to meet daily about five days ago.

After spending a week with Grayson, Emma had begun to grow much more comfortable than before - if that was possible. Being able to know more about him, as a person, helped. In addition, he began to know her personally as well. Living with him had been not only comforting but fun. Grayson had begun to open up more - he even lifted up the pictures of the woman he called Rosie. Though Emma didn't completely understand who she was... she found it better to not ask questions he wasn't ready to answer.

The only thing she didn't like was the fact that Internal Affairs, no thanks to Hannah, had been constantly monitoring Emma and Grayson. If Emma peeked out a window she wasn't entirely surprised to find the adjacent building having agents watching his apartment from a window. Gray had taught her how to spot a stakeout. It surprisingly wasn't as hard to find as she thought.

Emma had begun to close the blinds after that, even during the day.

In addition, Grayson had grown more comfortable leaving Emma at the apartment during the day while he was at work. Since agents were monitoring the building to begin with, he wasn't too concerned about Aaron being able to sneak in at all. With her own therapist's help and assurance, Emma became less worried as well.

After Grayson came home from work and Emma cooked them dinner, the pair merely flopped onto the couch. Though Gray sat sitting up, Emma sat laying upside down. She stuck her legs on the back of the couch in the air and let her head dangle off the bottom of the couch by Gray's knees. She sucked on a small lollipop, holding the stick with her fingers. Emma always loved her sweets but was never given any from Aaron. The moment that Grayson found out about this, he seemed to splurge on buying Emma an abundance of sugary treats.

Popping the sucker out of her mouth with her finger, she stared up at Grayson. "I talked to Doctor Simon earlier today."

"And?" Grayson asked. He was staring down at a few pieces of paper on his lap - likely a case or something that he had to do for work. She wasn't certain - she didn't know and she didn't have to know.

Swinging her legs around, Emma sat herself up. She waved the lollipop around with her finger slightly and glanced over at him. "He thinks I should try to see Arthur again. That I might be ready... or something."

Grayson blinked his eyes and looked up in slight surprise. He closed the folder on his lap and turned his attention towards Emma. "Do... you think you're ready?"

Emma shrugged her shoulders and pushed the sucker back into her mouth. She hadn't seen Arthur since the day she was free from Aaron. Hell, Grayson had seen Arthur more times than she had. He had to travel over to his house to retrieve her clothes and other belongings - though he said it was temporarily. "I don't know." Emma said honestly, pushing the sucker around with her mouth. "I mean... I really don't know. He was my husband, you know? I feel obligated to at least try." She blinked her eyes and shook her head. "Is." She corrected herself. "Is my husband."

Things were... much different now between her and Arthur. Emma saw her family for the first time a few days ago - and it was a relief. A majority of her family, especially her parents, wanted her to come home and stay with them for a while to recuperate. However, Emma was content staying with Grayson. Los Angeles was the town she was familiar with and she didn't want to travel all the way out East to go home. Not yet. Despite seeing her family, which she truly did miss, she still has yet to see Arthur.

"Do you think he'll be pissed I haven't seen him for over a week?" Emma asked curiously. Though she was able to be around blond men now, Emma wasn't entirely certain she would be able to be around blond pissed men. That would most definitely put her into a panic attack.

"Honestly?" Grayson shrugged his shoulders and glanced over at her. "Maybe. Though, I have a feeling he's likely more pissed at me than at you."

Emma fell quiet and nodded her head. Regardless on if he would be pissed at Grayson or Emma... Arthur being pissed overall wasn't going to be good. Not for her. "I just... I don't think I can handle seeing him mad." She said with concern.

Grayson understood and recognised more and more on when she had panic attacks. "If he does, we'll leave." Gray said with a confident nod. "In fact, when we go over I will even go in first. In case he is mad, I'll try to talk to him and tell him he needs to be calm. Would that help?"

Emma shrugged. She had no clue - but perhaps. It could work. "We can try that." She said, sucking on the orange lollipop. She pulled it out of her lap and held the stick, resting her arm against her leg. "Can we... go now?"

Gray shot his eyebrows up in surprise. "...Now?" He asked with both confusion and a hint of sadness. She wasn't sure where the sadness came from but she wasn't going to question it. "I mean, I suppose we can but... we should call first."

Emma shook her head and shrugged. "If he hasn't changed, he's not asleep and he'll be home. Besides, it was my house at one point too." Emma pushed herself up to her feet and chewed on the lollipop, breaking off the rest of the candy from the stick. Stepping over to a trashcan in the adjacent room, she tossed it away in the wastebin. "It doesn't have to be long. I just want to be able to tell Doctor Simon I was able to see Arthur." Emma shrugged her shoulder slightly. "That, and I want to see if I've progressed since last time."

"You have," Grayson said confidently while leaning forward to place the files on the coffee table in front of him. The table now had a handful of coasters on it - thanks to Emma's short rant a week ago. "You've definitely made progress."

Giving him a warm smile, Emma murmured her thanks and glanced towards the front door of the apartment. "Should we... go now or...?" She asked hesitantly - always minorly fearing making too many major decisions due to her training while becoming Emily. However, like Grayson had said, she was getting better.

"Yeah," Gray said. He stepped into the kitchen and sat down at the table, pulling on his shoes. Emma slipped on shoes herself and stood by the door patiently for Grayson to grab his car keys and wallet.

The pair walked out of the apartment and began to head towards the parking lot. Emma stepped over to the passenger side of the car and sat herself down once the car was unlocked. Unlike before, she lifted up her head and stared out the window as Grayson started the car. Driving was one thing Emma hasn't done since before she was taken by Aaron - and she missed doing it. Some day, when she becomes more confident and is ready to try it again, she would be eager to get behind the wheel.

At the same time, Emma fears that her driving abilities would likely be extremely down from where they once were at.

Grayson began to drive towards Emma's old house. She found it amusing that he seemed to know the route to her house extremely well. In fact, she would bet money that he had been to her house multiple times since she was originally taken by Aaron.

Eventually, they pulled up into the driveway. A car was parked on the street that Emma didn't recognise but she didn't think too much of it. "You wait here," Grayson said, turning to look at Emma. "I'm going to run on up and talk to Arthur. I'll come back and get you once I'm done talking to him. Alright?"

"Alright."