Sex is a learning, even for shitheads.

Part 2 : Always read the instructions

Part II. Always read the instructions.

Bakugô never ran upstairs so fast. The door barely had the time to close behind him that he was already barricading himself in his room, a tiny bag held tight against his chest. He heard his mother in the living room asking what the hell was going on with him again, but he didn't bother answering. He was going to wait until the red hue scattered all over face had faded before having any interaction with a human being.

« I can't believe how expensive this shit is... » he mumbled to himself, taking out a box of condoms from his bag.

He took the bus and went fifth stops away from his house to buy them. There was a pharmacy right around the corner, but his parents knew all the storekeepers and he wanted to avoid the 'I've seen your son buying condom last week' scene. His mom would never let him live it down. Not to mention that she would want to have some talking with him trapped between her and his dad and... Nope. Not happening.

Immediately, he hid the box of condoms in his night stand, under the climbing magazines he liked to read before going to bed. His hand remained on the drawer's handle though, and before he knew it, he was reopening it and retrieving the box. Leaving it on his bed, he peeked outside his room. Nobody to be heard upstairs. Good.

Closing the door, he went to sit on his bed, busying himself with removing the transparent plastic wrapping around the condoms' box. He then caught one of it between his fingers and pulled it out, surprised when all the rubbers came in the same time, attached to each other along with the instructions.

« What the hell ?! Why did they make a fucking tinsel with it ?! »

Here he was now, with twelve condoms resting on his knees. Cheeks heating, he stuffed almost everything back in the box, only keeping one and the instructions.

DIRECTIONS FOR USE :

- Use a new condom for every sexual act.

« Why do they even feel the need to precise that ? Are they really morons who think that washing and ironing it will do ? » Bakugô mumbled.

Lesions, pre-ejaculate secretions, semen, vaginal secretions and blood can all transmit infectious organisms.

- Tear open the package carefully. Do not use fingernails, teeth,...

What ?! So all those times he saw he girl tearing it open with her teeth in a porn was actually an unsafe move ? Fucking lame !

...scissors or anything that can damage the condom.

- Before any sexual contact, place the condom on the head of the erect penis. Be sure the rolled-up ring is on the outside. Leave space at tip to hold semen when you come.

- Squeeze tip gently so no air is trapped inside. Hold tip while you unroll condom all the way to the base of the erect penis. If the condom doesn't unroll, it may be on backwards, damaged or too old. Throw it away and start over with a new condom.

« Wait, those things have an expiry date ? Seriously ? » Bakugô said to himself, looking at the box under every angle until he indeed found a date. « No shit. »

- Immediately after ejaculation, hold the condom in place and withdraw the penis while it is still erect. Avoid spilling semen.
- Dispose of a used condom by wrapping it in tissue and throwing it in the trash. Wash your hands and genitals and surrounding areas with soap and water.

« What are you even putting on your condoms ?! Lube or acid ?! »

He stared deadly at the shiny squared wrap in his hands, as if trying to set it on fire. He actually could set it on fire, but never mind. Just the idea that he had condoms with him threw him back to being a helplessly horny boy. He couldn't stop thinking about when he'd use it, his brain providing him censurable pictures of how you would like beneath him.